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<blockquote data-quote="AtulaSiriwardane" data-source="post: 3631162" data-attributes="member: 120286">Osho Jokes on Mulla Nasrudin Part 2
<ul>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; A&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; patrolman was about to write a speeding ticket, when a woman in the back&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; seat began shouting at Mulla Nasrudin, ”There! I told you to watch out.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; But you kept right on. Getting out of line, not blowing your horn,&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; passing stop streets, speeding, and everything else. Didn’t I tell you,&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; you’d get caught? Didn’t I? Didn’t I?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Who is that woman?” the patrolman asked. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”My wife,” said the Mulla. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Drive on,” the patrolman said. ”you have been Punished enough.” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; Mulla&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Nasrudin was visiting the town dentist to get some advance prices on his&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; work. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”The price for pulling a tooth is four dollars each,” the dentist told&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; him. ”But in order to make it 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; painless we will have to give gas and that will be three dollars extra.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Oh, don’t worry about giving gas,” said the Mulla. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”That won’t be necessary. We can save the three dollars.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”That’s all right with me,” said the dentist. ”I have heard that you&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; mountain people are strong and 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; tough. All I can say is that you are a brave man.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”It isn’t me that’s having my tooth pulled,” said Nasrudin. ”it’s my&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; wife.” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">The professional money raiser 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; called upon Mulla Nasrudin. ”I am seeking contributions for a worthy&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; charity,” he said. ”Our goal 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; is 100, 000andawell − known philanthropist has already donated a quarter&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; of that.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Wonderful,” said Nasrudin. ”and I will give you another Quarter. Have&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; you Got 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Change for a dollar?” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">One Thursday night, Mulla Nasrudin came home&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; to supper. His wife served him baked beans. He 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; threw his plate of beans against the wall and shouted, ”I hate baked&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; beans.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ’Mulla, I can’t figure you out,” his wife said, 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Monday night you liked Baked beans, Tuesday night you liked baked&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; beans, 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Wednesday night you liked Baked beans and now, all of a sudden, on 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Thursday night, you say you hate Baked beans.” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">The prosecutor began his cross-examination of&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; the witness, Mulla Nasrudin. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Do you know this man?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”How should I know him?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Did he borrow money from you?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Why should he borrow money from me?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Annoyed, the judge asked the Mulla ”Why do you persist in answering&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; every question with another 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; question?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”why not?” said Mulla Nasrudin 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">Mulla Nasrudin had taken one too many when he&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; walked upto the police sargeant’s desk. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Officer you’d better lock me up,” he said. ”I just hit my wife on the&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; head with a beer bottle.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Did you kill her:” asked the officer. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Don’t think so,” said Nasrudin. ”that’s why i want you to lock me up.” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">Mulla Nasrudin’s family was on a picnic. The&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; wife was standing near the edge of a high cliff, admiring 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; the sea dashing on the rocks below. Her young son came up and said, ”Dad&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; says it’s not safe Here. Either you stand back farther or give me the&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; sandwiches.” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">The boss was complaining to Mulla Nasrudin&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; about his constant tardiness. ”It’s funny,” he said. ”You 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; are always late in the morning and you live right across the street.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Now, Billy Wilson, who lives two 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; miles away, is always on time.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”There is nothing funny about it,” said Nasrudin. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”if Billy is late in the morning, he can hurry, but if I am late, I am&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; here.” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">The boss told Mulla Nasrudin that if he could&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; not get to work on time, he would be fired. So the Mulla 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; went to the doctor, who gave him a pill. The Mulla took the pill, slept&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; well, and was awake before he 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; heard the alarm clock. He dressed and ate breakfast leisurely. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Later he strolled into the office, arriving half an hour before his&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; boss. When the boss came in, the 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Mulla said: 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Well, I didn’t have any trouble getting up this morning.” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”That’s good,” said Mulla Nasrudin’s boss, ”But where were you&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Yesterday?” 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Mulla Nasrudin had a house on the United States-Canadian border. No one&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; knew whether the house 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; was in the United States or Canada. It was decided to appoint a&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; committee to solve the problem. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; After deciding it was in the United States, Mulla Nasrudin leaped with&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; joy. ”HURRAH!” he shouted, 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”Now I don’t have to suffer from those terrible Canadian winters!” 
 </li>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;&nbsp; It was after the&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; intermission at the theater, and Mulla Nasrudin and his wife were&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; returning to their seats. ”Did I step on your feet as I went out?” the&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Mulla asked a man at the end of the row. ”You certainly did,” said the&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; man awaiting an apology. 
&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Mulla Nasrudin turned to his wife,”it’s all right, darling,” he said.&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; ”This is our Row.”</li>
</ul></blockquote>

[QUOTE="AtulaSiriwardane, post: 3631162, member: 120286"] [b]Osho Jokes on Mulla Nasrudin Part 2[/b] [SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080] [/COLOR][/SIZE][LIST] [*][COLOR=#000000] [FONT=NimbusSanL-Regu]A patrolman was about to write a speeding ticket, when a woman in the back seat began shouting at Mulla Nasrudin, ”There! I told you to watch out. But you kept right on. Getting out of line, not blowing your horn, passing stop streets, speeding, and everything else. Didn’t I tell you, you’d get caught? Didn’t I? Didn’t I?” ”Who is that woman?” the patrolman asked. ”My wife,” said the Mulla. ”Drive on,” the patrolman said. ”you have been Punished enough.” [/FONT][/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000] [FONT=NimbusSanL-Regu]Mulla Nasrudin was visiting the town dentist to get some advance prices on his work. ”The price for pulling a tooth is four dollars each,” the dentist told him. ”But in order to make it painless we will have to give gas and that will be three dollars extra.” ”Oh, don’t worry about giving gas,” said the Mulla. ”That won’t be necessary. We can save the three dollars.” ”That’s all right with me,” said the dentist. ”I have heard that you mountain people are strong and tough. All I can say is that you are a brave man.” ”It isn’t me that’s having my tooth pulled,” said Nasrudin. ”it’s my wife.” [/FONT][/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]The professional money raiser called upon Mulla Nasrudin. ”I am seeking contributions for a worthy charity,” he said. ”Our goal is 100, 000andawell − known philanthropist has already donated a quarter of that.” ”Wonderful,” said Nasrudin. ”and I will give you another Quarter. Have you Got Change for a dollar?” [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]One Thursday night, Mulla Nasrudin came home to supper. His wife served him baked beans. He threw his plate of beans against the wall and shouted, ”I hate baked beans.” ’Mulla, I can’t figure you out,” his wife said, ”Monday night you liked Baked beans, Tuesday night you liked baked beans, Wednesday night you liked Baked beans and now, all of a sudden, on Thursday night, you say you hate Baked beans.” [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]The prosecutor began his cross-examination of the witness, Mulla Nasrudin. ”Do you know this man?” ”How should I know him?” ”Did he borrow money from you?” ”Why should he borrow money from me?” Annoyed, the judge asked the Mulla ”Why do you persist in answering every question with another question?” ”why not?” said Mulla Nasrudin [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]Mulla Nasrudin had taken one too many when he walked upto the police sargeant’s desk. ”Officer you’d better lock me up,” he said. ”I just hit my wife on the head with a beer bottle.” ”Did you kill her:” asked the officer. ”Don’t think so,” said Nasrudin. ”that’s why i want you to lock me up.” [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]Mulla Nasrudin’s family was on a picnic. The wife was standing near the edge of a high cliff, admiring the sea dashing on the rocks below. Her young son came up and said, ”Dad says it’s not safe Here. Either you stand back farther or give me the sandwiches.” [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]The boss was complaining to Mulla Nasrudin about his constant tardiness. ”It’s funny,” he said. ”You are always late in the morning and you live right across the street. Now, Billy Wilson, who lives two miles away, is always on time.” ”There is nothing funny about it,” said Nasrudin. ”if Billy is late in the morning, he can hurry, but if I am late, I am here.” [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000]The boss told Mulla Nasrudin that if he could not get to work on time, he would be fired. So the Mulla went to the doctor, who gave him a pill. The Mulla took the pill, slept well, and was awake before he heard the alarm clock. He dressed and ate breakfast leisurely. Later he strolled into the office, arriving half an hour before his boss. When the boss came in, the Mulla said: ”Well, I didn’t have any trouble getting up this morning.” ”That’s good,” said Mulla Nasrudin’s boss, ”But where were you Yesterday?” Mulla Nasrudin had a house on the United States-Canadian border. No one knew whether the house was in the United States or Canada. It was decided to appoint a committee to solve the problem. After deciding it was in the United States, Mulla Nasrudin leaped with joy. ”HURRAH!” he shouted, ”Now I don’t have to suffer from those terrible Canadian winters!” [/COLOR] [*][COLOR=#000000] [FONT=Georgia]It was after the intermission at the theater, and Mulla Nasrudin and his wife were returning to their seats. ”Did I step on your feet as I went out?” the Mulla asked a man at the end of the row. ”You certainly did,” said the man awaiting an apology. Mulla Nasrudin turned to his wife,”it’s all right, darling,” he said. ”This is our Row.”[/FONT][/COLOR][/LIST] [/QUOTE]

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