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Message: <blockquote data-quote="deffa" data-source="post: 5153" data-attributes="member: 57">1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leaveyour name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we'renot here. So, leave a message.3. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent themoney. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financialaid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends,you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty ofmoney.4. Hi. Now you say something.5. Hi, I'm not home right now, but my answering machine is, so you cantalk to it instead. Wait for the beep.6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?7. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a"sexy" message, I'll call sooner8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator.Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself withsomeof these magnets.9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receivingmessages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and theircarpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do notneed their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name andnumber and they will get back to you.10. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathicthought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, yournumber and your reason for calling, and I'll think about returning yourcall.11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leaveme a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now.Leave a message and then wait by your phone until I call you back.13. If you are a burglar, then we're probably at home cleaning ourweaponsright now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren'thomeand it's safe to leave a message.14. Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remainsilent.Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phoneright now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likesdoing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right ... real slowly.So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll getbackto you.</blockquote>

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