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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Nash'" data-source="post: 2803720" data-attributes="member: 10026">malli...waradi hoyanwa newei harida?i reeli appreciate ur tru feelns n da braveness to ryt n i gez cmments lyk myn wud only encurage u to ryt mor n mor n not discurage u...rytt?so here goes bro..1st f all tz reel sensitive n cute...way to go...evry1 can cmment n da bryt syd nuh..so i'l point out sm mistakes k? not big ones...jz lil stf dt u can improve n go on to be a perfect writer... <img src="/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/default/wink.gif"  class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=";)" title="Wink    ;)" data-shortname=";)" />1st machan.. wen u say LOVE u cant put DO.. love goes wit DOES...so t shud b LOVE DOES MAKE CHANGES.in da 4th stanza"s last 2 words...OF wrd is missn...  coz OF u ... it shud be ryt bro?5th stanza dun make any senz ..duz it bro? luv is awesum but loving u makes it perfect...??wt f u say... luv is awesum but luving u mks it amazing or smthn?cz da 2 wrds AWESUM n PERFECT dun av a cnnection btween 'em..so u cant put a comparission btween 'em..try sm wrds dat av comparissions lyk... GUD- PERFECTAWESUM-AMAZING n etcand finally bro... u went lyk... "LIKE DIS LIKE DIS" in all line endings but skippd dat pattern in 4th stanza's 3rd line nh? try to keep up wit da pattern... t adds so mch colour to da poem..nywy...am not a big poet or a big critic or nthn... jz wrote dis to appreciate ur try n make u n thnkn dat dis wud help u to perfectize ur rytn nd a future..ALL DA BEST MAN!keep it up!</blockquote>

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