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<blockquote data-quote="gayaru" data-source="post: 2208048" data-attributes="member: 59946"><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">1. A Foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption: </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD, </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">3. Three FASTEST means of Communication:</span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">1. Tele-Phone.</span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">2. Tele-Vision.</span></strong></p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">3. Tell to Woman (Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE).</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699"></span></strong> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Moral: BE SPECIFIC</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time?</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">7. Let us be generous like this: Four Ants are moving through a forest.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says: we should KILL him.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Ant 2 says: No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says: No, we will just throw him away from our path.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Ant 4 says: No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">9. Question: When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE?</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Answer: On their MARRIAGE.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #006699">Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.</span></strong></p><p> </p><p> <strong><span style="color: #006699">12. "A Ship is always safe at the shore - but that is NOT what it is built for" - Albert Einstein</span></strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gayaru, post: 2208048, member: 59946"] [B][COLOR=#006699]1. A Foolish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption: Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD, After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]3. Three FASTEST means of Communication:[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#006699]1. Tele-Phone.[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#006699]2. Tele-Vision.[/COLOR][/B] [B][COLOR=#006699]3. Tell to Woman (Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE). [/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]5. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman. Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him. Moral: BE SPECIFIC[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time? It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]7. Let us be generous like this: Four Ants are moving through a forest. They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says: we should KILL him. Ant 2 says: No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says: No, we will just throw him away from our path. Ant 4 says: No, we will LEAVE him because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life. If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]9. Question: When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE? Answer: On their MARRIAGE.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women. Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.[/COLOR][/B][COLOR=windowtext][/COLOR] [COLOR=windowtext] [/COLOR] [B][COLOR=#006699]12. "A Ship is always safe at the shore - but that is NOT what it is built for" - Albert Einstein[/COLOR][/B] [/QUOTE]
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