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Message: <blockquote data-quote="xcorect" data-source="post: 863330" data-attributes="member: 27281"><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">This is an actual job application someone submitted at a McDonald's</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">fast-food establishment AND THEY HIRED HIM! (editor's note: I would have</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">hired him too!!)</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">NAME: Greg Bulmash</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DESIRED POSITION: Reclining. HA But seriously, whatever's available. If I</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">severance package. If that's not possible make an offer and we can haggle.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">EDUCATION: Yes.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">SALARY: Less than I'm worth.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">post-it notes.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">intimate environment.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">you have a car that runs?"</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DO YOU SMOKE?: Only when set on fire.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px"></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Book Antiqua'"><span style="font-size: 15px">SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising.</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>

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