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ElaKiri Talk!
Marraige...!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="scoobss" data-source="post: 452718" data-attributes="member: 13192"><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">1. Marriage is not a word. It's a sentence (a life sentence). </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">2. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">the blind. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">3. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">the woman gets her masters. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">4. Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">suffering. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">5. Married life is full of excitement and frustration: In the first year of </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">woman speaks and the man listens.In the third year, they both speak and the </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">NEIGHBOUR listens. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">6. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">friends.Youorder what you want, and when you see what the other person </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">has, you wish </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">you had ordered that instead. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">7. There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">himself divorced. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">8. A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">the wife takes. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">9. Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">I'm still paying for it. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">10. Son: Is it true Dad? I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">his wife until he marries her. Father: That happens everywhere, son, </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">EVERYWHERE! </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">11. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">12. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">love; after marriage it is self-defence. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">13. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a 10-year </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">married man looks happy, we wonder why. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">14. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">They got married, and now he is going through HELL. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">16. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">keep her. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">17. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America, the rest cheat in </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">Europe. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">18. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin. They just </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">can't face each other, but they still stay together. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">19. Marriage is when a man and a woman become one. The trouble starts when </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">they try to decide which one. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">20. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After the marriage </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">the "Y" becomes silent. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">21. I married Miss right; I just didn't know her first name was Always. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">22. It's not true that married men live longer than single men, it only </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">seems longer. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">23. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">24. A man was complaining to a friend: I HAD IT ALL-MONEY, A BEAUTIFUL </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">HOUSE, THE LOVE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THEN POW! IT WAS ALL GONE. WHAT </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">HAPPENED, asked his friend. He says MY WIFE FOUND OUT. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">25. WIFE: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. HUSBAND: OK, but if you </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">get home before I do, leave the hallway lights on. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">26. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another: AREN'T YOU WEARING YOUR </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">RING ON THE WRONG FINGER? The other replied, YES, I, AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">MAN. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">27. Man is incomplete until he gets married, then he is finished. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">28. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">up with the same boss. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">29. A man inserted an ad in the paper - WIFE WANTED. The next day he </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">received a hundred of letters and they all said the same thing - YOU CAN </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">HAVE MINE. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'"></span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">30. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of </span></span></p><p><span style="color: Navy"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'">one thing - either the car is new or the wife is.</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="scoobss, post: 452718, member: 13192"] [COLOR="Navy"][FONT="Comic Sans MS"]1. Marriage is not a word. It's a sentence (a life sentence). 2. Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore marriage is an institution for the blind. 3. Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his Bachelor's Degree and the woman gets her masters. 4. Marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering. 5. Married life is full of excitement and frustration: In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.In the third year, they both speak and the NEIGHBOUR listens. 6. Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends.Youorder what you want, and when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that instead. 7. There was this man who muttered a few words in the church and found himself married. A year later he muttered something in his sleep and found himself divorced. 8. A happy marriage is a matter of giving and taking; the husband gives and the wife takes. 9. Son: How much does it cost to get married, Dad? Father: I don't know son, I'm still paying for it. 10. Son: Is it true Dad? I heard that in ancient China, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her. Father: That happens everywhere, son, EVERYWHERE! 11. Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock. 12. They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love; after marriage it is self-defence. 13. When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a 10-year married man looks happy, we wonder why. 14. There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her. They got married, and now he is going through HELL. 16. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. 17. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America, the rest cheat in Europe. 18. After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin. They just can't face each other, but they still stay together. 19. Marriage is when a man and a woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one. 20. Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After the marriage the "Y" becomes silent. 21. I married Miss right; I just didn't know her first name was Always. 22. It's not true that married men live longer than single men, it only seems longer. 23. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. 24. A man was complaining to a friend: I HAD IT ALL-MONEY, A BEAUTIFUL HOUSE, THE LOVE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN, THEN POW! IT WAS ALL GONE. WHAT HAPPENED, asked his friend. He says MY WIFE FOUND OUT. 25. WIFE: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. HUSBAND: OK, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway lights on. 26. At a cocktail party, one woman said to another: AREN'T YOU WEARING YOUR RING ON THE WRONG FINGER? The other replied, YES, I, AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG MAN. 27. Man is incomplete until he gets married, then he is finished. 28. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss. 29. A man inserted an ad in the paper - WIFE WANTED. The next day he received a hundred of letters and they all said the same thing - YOU CAN HAVE MINE. 30. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new or the wife is.[/FONT][/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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