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<blockquote data-quote="pissupoosa jr." data-source="post: 7086313" data-attributes="member: 209195"><p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">What is the speed of darkness?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"><strong>Did you ever stop and wonder...</strong></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum.'</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Why do the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Stop singing and read on.........</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?</span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy"></span></span></p> <p style="text-align: left"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: Navy">Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?</span></span> </p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="pissupoosa jr., post: 7086313, member: 209195"] [LEFT][SIZE=4][COLOR=Navy]Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat? Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough? What is the speed of darkness? Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours? If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? [B]Did you ever stop and wonder...[/B] Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?' Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum.' Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is? Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Why do the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Stop singing and read on......... Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?[/COLOR][/SIZE] [/LEFT] [/QUOTE]
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