HOW DO YOU GET HOLY WATER?
You boil the hell out of it.
WHAT DO FISH SAY WHEN THEY HIT A CONCRETE WALL?
Dam!
WHAT DO ESKIMOS GET FROM SITTING ON THE ICE TOO LONG?
Polaroids.
WHAT DO YOU CALL A BOOMERANG THAT DOESN'T WORK?
A stick.
WHAT DO YOU GET FROM A PAMPERED COW?
Spoiled milk.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN WITH A VAMPIRE?
Frostbite.
WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES?
A nervous wreck.
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ROAST BEEF AND PEA SOUP?
Anyone can roast beef.
WHERE DO YOU FIND A DOG WITH NO LEGS?
Right where you left him.
WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS?
Because they have big fingers.
WHY DON'T BLIND PEOPLE LIKE TO SKY DIVE?
Because it scares the hell out of the dog.
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BAD GOLFER AND A BAD SKYDIVER?
A bad golfer goes whack, "damn." A bad skydiver goes "damn," whack.
HOW DO YOU CATCH A UNIQUE RABBIT?
Unique up on it.
HOW DO YOU CATCH A TAME RABBIT?
Tame way, unique up on it.
You boil the hell out of it.
WHAT DO FISH SAY WHEN THEY HIT A CONCRETE WALL?
Dam!
WHAT DO ESKIMOS GET FROM SITTING ON THE ICE TOO LONG?
Polaroids.
WHAT DO YOU CALL A BOOMERANG THAT DOESN'T WORK?
A stick.
WHAT DO YOU GET FROM A PAMPERED COW?
Spoiled milk.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN WITH A VAMPIRE?
Frostbite.
WHAT LIES AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN AND TWITCHES?
A nervous wreck.
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ROAST BEEF AND PEA SOUP?
Anyone can roast beef.
WHERE DO YOU FIND A DOG WITH NO LEGS?
Right where you left him.
WHY DO GORILLAS HAVE BIG NOSTRILS?
Because they have big fingers.
WHY DON'T BLIND PEOPLE LIKE TO SKY DIVE?
Because it scares the hell out of the dog.
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BAD GOLFER AND A BAD SKYDIVER?
A bad golfer goes whack, "damn." A bad skydiver goes "damn," whack.
HOW DO YOU CATCH A UNIQUE RABBIT?
Unique up on it.
HOW DO YOU CATCH A TAME RABBIT?
Tame way, unique up on it.
