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Message: <blockquote data-quote="MaD-DoC" data-source="post: 2521372" data-attributes="member: 56284">Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet  time:   1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when  they aren't looking.   2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute  intervals.   3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.   4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3'  in housewares ..... and see what happens.   5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.   6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.   7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers y  ou'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding  department.   8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why  can't you  people just leave me alone?'   9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick  your nose.   10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he  knows where the anti- depressants are.   11. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission  Impossible" theme.   12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different  size funnels.   13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK  ME!"   14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal  position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"   ( And; last, but not least!)   15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and,  then, yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet pa per in here!"</blockquote>

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