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Message: <blockquote data-quote="MaD-DoC" data-source="post: 2638104" data-attributes="member: 56284">Signs that you are too drunk would be...     * You lose arguments with inanimate objects.     * You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.     * Job interfering with your drinking.     * Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.     * Career won't progress beyond Senator of Massachusetts.     * The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.     * Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.     * 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not!     * Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem!     * You can focus better with one eye closed.     * The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.     * Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.     * Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!     * Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you     * At AA meetings you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..."     * Your idea of cutting back is less salt.     * You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmmm.     * The whole bar says 'Hi' when you come in...</blockquote>

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