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How to beat your wife in Islam
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Former nun tells of sex and suffering inside Indian convent
Catholic Church stung by autobiography recounting harassment and abuse
By Andrew Buncombe in Delhi
Friday, 20 February 2009
ALAMY
Kerala nuns at prayer. An ex-nun who wrote about life in a Kerala convent says she fears for those still living there
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A former nun's tell-all story which details illicit relationships, sexual harassment and bullying in the convent where she spent three decades is causing ructions in the Catholic Church in the south Indian state of Kerala.
In Amen – an autobiography of a nun, Sister Jesme says when she became a nun she discovered priests were forcing novices to have sex with them. There were also secret homosexual relationships among the nuns and at one point she was forced into such a relationship by another nun who told her she preferred this kind of arrangement as it ruled out the possibility of pregnancy.
"I did not want to make this book controversial. I want to express my feelings and to explain what happened to me... I want people to know how I have suffered," she told The Independent last night, speaking from the town of Kozhikode. "People say that everything is OK, but I was in the convent and I want them to know what goes on. I have concerns for others."
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Sister Jesme, who quit last year as the principal of a Catholic college in Thrissur, alleges senior nuns tried to have her committed to a mental institution after she spoke out against them.
In her book, she says that while travelling through Bangalore, she was once directed to stay with a purportedly pious priest who took her to a garden "and showed me several pairs cuddling behind trees. He also gave me a sermon on the necessity of physical love and described the illicit affairs that certain bishops and priests had". The priest took her to his home, stripped off his clothes and ordered her to do the same.
She also alleges that while senior staff turned a blind eye to the actions of more experienced nuns, novices were strongly punished, even for minor transgressions. She was not allowed to go home after she learnt her father had died. "I was able to see [the body of] my father barely 15 minutes before the funeral," she writes. "The [response] of the superiors was that the then senior sisters were not even lucky enough to see the bodies of their parents."
When she resigned as a college principal, she claimed convents had become "houses of torture", saying: "The mental torture was unbearable. When I questioned the church's stand on self-financing colleges and certain other issues, they accused me of having mental problems. They have even sent me to a psychiatrist. There are many nuns undergoing ill-treatment from the order, but they are afraid of challenging it. The church is a formidable fortress."
The allegations are not the only controversy to rock the Catholic Church in Kerala. Last summer, a 23-year-old novice committed suicide and left a note saying she had been harassed by her Mother Superior. Reports suggest there have been a number of similar suicides. And in November, police in Kerala arrested two priests and a nun in connection with the killing of Sister Abhaya in a notorious 1992 murder.
Last night, a spokesman for the Syro-Malabar order of the Catholic Church, Dr Paul Thelakkat, dismissed Sister Jesme's allegations as a "book of trivialities". "It's her experiences, but these are things that might creep into a society of communal living," he said. Asked if the church would be shocked by the allegations, he replied: "Absolutely not. The church knows about these things."
Catholic Church stung by autobiography recounting harassment and abuse
By Andrew Buncombe in Delhi
Friday, 20 February 2009
ALAMYKerala nuns at prayer. An ex-nun who wrote about life in a Kerala convent says she fears for those still living there
enlarge Sponsored Links
A former nun's tell-all story which details illicit relationships, sexual harassment and bullying in the convent where she spent three decades is causing ructions in the Catholic Church in the south Indian state of Kerala.
In Amen – an autobiography of a nun, Sister Jesme says when she became a nun she discovered priests were forcing novices to have sex with them. There were also secret homosexual relationships among the nuns and at one point she was forced into such a relationship by another nun who told her she preferred this kind of arrangement as it ruled out the possibility of pregnancy.
"I did not want to make this book controversial. I want to express my feelings and to explain what happened to me... I want people to know how I have suffered," she told The Independent last night, speaking from the town of Kozhikode. "People say that everything is OK, but I was in the convent and I want them to know what goes on. I have concerns for others."
Related articles
Sister Jesme, who quit last year as the principal of a Catholic college in Thrissur, alleges senior nuns tried to have her committed to a mental institution after she spoke out against them.
In her book, she says that while travelling through Bangalore, she was once directed to stay with a purportedly pious priest who took her to a garden "and showed me several pairs cuddling behind trees. He also gave me a sermon on the necessity of physical love and described the illicit affairs that certain bishops and priests had". The priest took her to his home, stripped off his clothes and ordered her to do the same.
She also alleges that while senior staff turned a blind eye to the actions of more experienced nuns, novices were strongly punished, even for minor transgressions. She was not allowed to go home after she learnt her father had died. "I was able to see [the body of] my father barely 15 minutes before the funeral," she writes. "The [response] of the superiors was that the then senior sisters were not even lucky enough to see the bodies of their parents."
When she resigned as a college principal, she claimed convents had become "houses of torture", saying: "The mental torture was unbearable. When I questioned the church's stand on self-financing colleges and certain other issues, they accused me of having mental problems. They have even sent me to a psychiatrist. There are many nuns undergoing ill-treatment from the order, but they are afraid of challenging it. The church is a formidable fortress."
The allegations are not the only controversy to rock the Catholic Church in Kerala. Last summer, a 23-year-old novice committed suicide and left a note saying she had been harassed by her Mother Superior. Reports suggest there have been a number of similar suicides. And in November, police in Kerala arrested two priests and a nun in connection with the killing of Sister Abhaya in a notorious 1992 murder.
Last night, a spokesman for the Syro-Malabar order of the Catholic Church, Dr Paul Thelakkat, dismissed Sister Jesme's allegations as a "book of trivialities". "It's her experiences, but these are things that might creep into a society of communal living," he said. Asked if the church would be shocked by the allegations, he replied: "Absolutely not. The church knows about these things."
ehenum kiyamu balanna oyagollan kohomada gahanne kiyala.. adare wadi kamatada wadiyen gahanne ha?...
ow eka witharai ne kiyanna thiyenne bun monahari ahuwama ... utharayak diyanko mang ahapu prashneta.. prashnayak ahuwama kelin utharayak denna. api baye panala yanne naha ne. eka nathuwa prophet lage wife gana oya duk wenna epa...
your mind also fill with filthy thoughts ..... it seems you have taken the word "ganhanne " completely wrong i am not going to answer these kind of useless questions
Typicla muslims
love your enemy means we can not even think of wife beating (not even lightly) according to Lord Jesus Christ
I thnk my answer is clear right?
I thnk my answer is clear right?
well first I wanna say,. I ain't a muslim and believe no one has got a right to lay their hand on his/her spouse. but still it happens right? even in Christian and buddhism though it was refused the violence still it happens right>? in this I believe Islam is bit correct. cause it's impossible to prevent husband hits a wife no matter what. but Islam minimizes the damage level by ordering them to how to hit them light and ignore face. so people know how to hit properly without doing much damage. I ain't biased or anything I am a female anyway. but I suppose everyone should avoid from violence unless it's really important like think if your husband became a zombie 
then you would have to killed him definitely.
then you would have to killed him definitely.
well first I wanna say,. I ain't a muslim and believe no one has got a right to lay their hand on his/her spouse. but still it happens right? even in Christian and buddhism though it was refused the violence still it happens right>?
Yeah Domestic violance in any form is damn wrong , people still do such kind of things not becuase Buddhism or Christianity say so bt because he is not following it truely bt how terrible holy book approve wife beating? ha ? parent sold me when we do something wrong even though we do not obey to them bt how terrible parant tell their children to do such things? i can b'live there are people who just blindly following wrong teachings in because it is in their holy book . real question is can we say that book is "HOLY"? I am damn sure you are a muslim you have no option bt to accept it because it is the word of your loving GOD allah
in this I believe Islam is bit correct. cause it's impossible to prevent husband hits a wife no matter what. but Islam minimizes the damage level by ordering them to how to hit them light and ignore face. so people know how to hit properly without doing much damage. I ain't biased or anything I am a female anyway. but I suppose everyone should avoid from violence unless it's really important like think if your husband became a zombie
then you would have to killed him definitely.
Jesus Christ !
- there are people like you who is approving domestic violance ha? it is very sad because you said (may be pretend to be a woman) are a women 
Jesus Christ !
I don't accept domestic violence. but I believe what the Quran says is correct though I am a true Christian but I am not saying everything in Quran is correct I said this is correct somewhat. cause u know it's impossible to stop violence no matter what. but it says how to properly make a violence without making lot of damages. I think it prevents lot of damages on women cause Most of Muslims believe whatever the Quran says I guess . and also I said it's a responsibility of men to respect women but if she is bitching on you. you have to do something. because I have seen many my friends who are bit violence yeah they are females too. so what the man does if like that of a female punches him hard? you think tolerate it. in that case any man will definitely beats his wife but this statement prevents lot of damages if he follows the religion correctly.but wait I am not saying men should beat women but they should know how to get away from it by doing light beat on her.
Do u think in cyber realm the default gender is male? do u think I need to prove that I am a female by showing my genital organs? what the heck
there are lot of males in cyber realm who use male's avatars, male's names but if a female uses either a female name or an avatar she will be accused to pretend to be a female.
the fault is on people like you who pretend to be females and ruin our names as well.
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in this I believe Islam is bit correct. cause it's impossible to prevent husband hits a wife no matter what. but Islam minimizes the damage level by ordering them to how to hit them light and ignore face. so people know how to hit properly without doing much damage. I ain't biased or anything I am a female anyway. but I suppose everyone should avoid from violence unless it's really important like think if your husband became a zombie
then you would have to killed him definitely.
What a MYSOGINIST!
And I am sure you aprove Muhammad the child abuse case is also correct eh?
I don't accept domestic violence. but I believe what the Quran says is correct though I am a true Christian but I am not saying everything in Quran is correct I said this is correct somewhat.
If you are a True Christian you will love your wife & you can not even imagine abt beatibg your wife I do not know why you accept it I also not going to say Whole thing in that book is completely wrong bt I am Against this Wife Beating verse in quran (which is a main cause of Domestic violance)
So said that you are a true Christian did you know what Jesus tell us? ha
forget abt wives Jesus taught us to love even our enemes then you can not even think about beating you ever loving wife for any reason ( if she found guilty of unfaithfulness only you can disvoice her) take a look at what Jesus said abt non-violance
“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth. But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also." - Matthew 5:38-39
"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. " 1 John 4:7
So if you do not love yourself & your wife how you are going to love others? how you are going to love your enemies?
"Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them." Colossians 3:19
cause u know it's impossible to stop violence no matter what.
No it is possible there is nothing impossible what you think you become so as far as you think it is not possible you can not overcome it
but it says how to properly make a violence without making lot of damages.
even if you break one law you are guilty of breaking the law, it does matter how small is the damage, it does matter how big is your lie end of the day you are guilty of telling a lie
I think it prevents lot of damages on women cause Most of Muslims believe whatever the Quran says I guess . and also I said it's a responsibility of men to respect women but if she is bitching on you. you have to do something.
because I have seen many my friends who are bit violence yeah they are females too. so what the man does if like that of a female punches him hard? you think tolerate it. in that case any man will definitely beats his wife but this statement prevents lot of damages if he follows the religion correctly.but wait I am not saying men should beat women but they should know how to get away from it by doing light beat on her.
I am damn sure you are a muslim you are not a christian
Do u think in cyber realm the default gender is male? No
do u think I need to prove that I am a female by showing my genital organs?
No no don't do it because you have to cover your whole body na mchan
what the heck
there are lot of males in cyber realm who use male's avatars, male's names but if a female uses either a female name or an avatar she will be accused to pretend to be a female.
the fault is on people like you who pretend to be females and ruin our names as well.
I said that you might be pretending to act like a women just to save your religion other than that no real women likes to get beat from his husband
