ඉන්දීයානු මාතායි ගේ රස වූ කුණු කතා - Indian version of Ranja

[kalaweddha]

ඉන්දීයානු මාතායි ගේ රස වූ කුණු කතා - Indian version of Ranja

ශී‍්‍ර ලංකා රංජන්ගේ ඉන්දීයානු මාතායි ගේ රස වූ කුණු කතා...

රන්ජන්ගේ හඬපට කෙළිය දිනෙන් දින උත්කර්ෂයට නැංවෙමින් තිබේ. දවස උදා වෙද්දී අද දින රෙදි උනා ගන්නේ කවුදැයි දැනගැනුමට මහජනතාව පුල පුලා බලා සිටිති. ඒ ගැන දැන ගැනීමට සාමාන්‍ය ජනයා ප‍්‍රවෘත්ති ප‍්‍රකාශ නරඹන අතර නව තාක්ෂණය භාවිතා කිරීමට දන්නා උදවිය ඊට කළින්, රෙදි උනා ගන්නා එකාගේ සෙළුව අන්තර් ජාලයෙන් වඩාත් සවිස්තරව දැක බලාගනිති. මේ දිනවල රූපවාහිනී නාලිකාකරුවන්ගේ ද කරල පැහී තම තමන්ගේ රේටින්ග්ස් තරගයට ඉහළ දමාගන්නා ආකාරයක් ද දක්නට ලැබෙයි.

අපේ රටේ ජනතාව කවි, කතන්දර අසන්නට ස්වභාවයෙන්ම රුචි ජාතියක් බව ලෝක ප‍්‍රසිද්ධය. ජානවලින්ම පැවත එන අපේ මේ මාහැඟි පුරුද්ද පටන්ගන්නේ මව් කුසේ සිටමය. ඉන්පසු ආත්තම්මාගෙන් කතාන්දර අසාගන්නා අවධියද ආදිය පසුකොට රූපවාහිනී වැල් ටෙලිවලින් මාර කතන්දර අසාගන්නා අවධිය හරහා පැමිණ ප‍්‍රවෘත්තිවලින් ඒ වැඬේ කරගන්නා අවධියට දැන් පැමිණ තිබේ. ඒ කෙසේ වුවද කෙනෙකු තවකෙකු විශ්වාස කොට කියනා දෙයක් හෝ කරනා දෙයක් ඔහුට හොරෙන් තවකෙකුට කීම ලජ්ජා නැති අශික්ෂිත දෙයකි. ගමේ ගොඬේ භාෂාවෙන් කියතොත් අසික්කිත වැඩකි. චීත්ත වැඩකි. එසේම කෙනෙකු ඔබ විශ්වාස කොට පවසනා දෙයක් ඔබට නොදන්වා පටිගත කිරීම නීති විරෝධී වැඩකි. (දුරකථන සමාගමකට අප ඇමතුමක් ගත් විට ”වඩාත් හොඳ සේවාවක් සැලසීම සඳහා මේ ඇමතුම පටිගත වන බව කරුණාවෙන් සළකන්න’යි (එසේ නොකිරීම වෙනම කාරණාවකි.* අපට ඇසෙන්නේ එබැවිනි. ඒ, ඔබ ඊට අකැමති නම් ඔබට එම ඇමතුම විසන්ධි කරන්නටය.* ඉතින් ඒ පුද්ගලික කතාබහ එකෙකු දෙන්නෙකුට නොව මුළු ලෝකයටම කීම නොහොත් ඇසෙන්නට සැලැස්වීම කෙතෙක් අසික්කිතදැයි සිතාගත නොහැකි තරම්ය. බුදුන් වහන්සේ දස අකුසල්හි කේළාම් කීම යනුවෙන් අර්ථ දක්වා තහංචි පනවා ඇත්තේ මිනී මරාගන්නට තරම් දුරදිග යාහැකි මේ අමන වැඬේය. එහෙත් එකී කේළම්, පුද්ගලයෙකුට වඩා රටකට, රටක ජනතාවට අතිශය ලෙස බලපාන කාරණා හෙළිදරව් කරයි නම් ජනතාව ඒවා දැනගතයුත්තේයැයිද ඒවා දැනගැනීමට අයිතියක් ඇතැයි ද අපි සිතමු. අප ගරු කොට ඇත්තේ, අප ආදරය කොට ඇත්තේ මොන තරම් අසික්කීත පුද්ගලයන්ටදැයි හා අපව මෙහෙයවා ඇත්තේ අපේ ඉරණම තීන්දු කොට ඇත්තේ මොන තරම් අමනයින්දැයි අපට දැනගන්නට ලැබෙන්නේ එවිටය. එකී ඇත්ත අපට දැනගන්නට සැලැස්වූ රන්ජන් මහතාට අප හද පත්ලෙන්ම ස්තුතිවන්ත විය යුතු වන්නේ ඒ නිසාය.

රන්ජන් මහතා මේ කළ වැඬේ ඉතිහාසයේ පළමු වරට සිදු වූ දෙයක් නොවන්නේය. මෙවැනි සිද්ධීන් මේ ආකාරයට නොවුණත් මීට සමාන ආකාරයකින් මීට පෙර සිදු වී ඇත්තේය. අපේ අසල්වැසියා වූ ඉන්දියාවේ ද වරක් මෙවැනි දෙයක් සිදුවිය. ඒ ඉන්දීය නායකයන්ගේ රෙදි ගැලවෙන ආකාරයේ පොතක් පළවීමය. (රන්ජන් මහතා ආදර්ශයට ගත්තේ ඒ පොත යැයි අප නොකියන්නේ රන්ජන් මහතා පොත්පත් කියවීම වැනි අමන මරිමෝඩ වැඩ කරන අයෙක් යැයි අප හීනෙන්වත් නොසිතන නිසාය.* එකී පොත මුද්‍රණ ද්වාරයෙන් පිට වූ සැණින් හොල්මන් වූ ඉන්දීය නායකයන් වහා එය තහනම් කළේ ගැලවී වැටෙන තම වස්ත‍්‍රයන් දණහිස හරියේදීවත් අල්ලාගනු පිණිසය. එහෙත් ඒ වැඬේ හරි නොගියේ පොතෙහි පීඞීඑෆ් පිටපතක් අන්තර්ජාලය පුරා සැරිසරන්නට පටන්ගැනීම නිසාය. මේ ආන්දෝලනාත්මක පොතේ නම Reminiscences of the Nehru Age (1978) and My Days with Nehru (1979). එම්. ඕ. මතායි නම් මහතකු විසින් නේරු යුගයේ ඔහු ඇසුරු කළ ඉන්දීය නායකයන් පිළිබඳ ඔහුගේ අතිශය පෞද්ගලික අත්දැකීම් මෙයින් හෙළි කොට තිබේ. මතායි යනු ඉන්දීය අගමැතිවරයකු වූ ජවහර්ලාල් නේරුගේ පුද්ගලික සහායක ලෙස 1946 සිට 1959 දක්වා අවුරුදු 13 ක් පමණ සේවය කළ කාලයේ ඉන්දීය නායකයන් බොහොමයක් ඉතා සමීපව ඇසුරු කළ පුද්ගලයෙකි. ඔහු ඒ අත්දැකීම් පොතක් වශයෙන් එළිදක්වන්නේ එක එක නායකයන්ගේ රෙදි එක එක පරිච්ෙඡ්ද වශයෙන් වෙන්කොට ගැලවීමෙනි.

නේරු පිළිබඳව වෙන් කර ඇති පරිච්ෙඡ්දයන්හි මතායි, කාන්තාවන් සමග නේරුගේ තිබූ පෞද්ගලික සබඳතාවන් විස්තර කොට දක්වා තිබේ. මවුන්ට්බැට්න් සාමිවරයාගේ භාර්යාව වූ එඞ්විනා හා නේරුගේ තිබූ ප්ලෙටෝනික ආදරය හැරුණු කොට පද්මජා නායිදු (ප‍්‍රකට ඉන්දීය කිවිඳිය සරෝජිනී නායිදුගේ දියණිය* හා ම්රිදුලා සරාබායි ඇතුළු නේරුගේ ස්ත‍්‍රී සබඳතා ගැන තොරතුරු සඳහන් කොට තිබේ.

”මවුන්ට්බැට්න් ආර්යාව පිටත්ව ගිය පසු බටහිර පර්යන්තයේදී මට පද්මජා හමු විය. වෙනත් කතාබහ අතර ඇය ශෝකයෙන් පැවසුවේ, ”ජවහර් එක ගෑනියෙකුගෙ මිනිහෙක් නොවෙයි’’ යනුවෙනි. ඇය එය හොයාගන්නට ලොකු කාලයක් ගත්තා යැයි මම මටම කියා ගතිමි. වසරකට පසු මවුන්ට්බැට්න් ආර්යාව වූ එඞ්විනාගේ ඡුායාරූප දෙකක් නේරුගේ නිදන කාමරයේ තිබෙනු දක්නා ලද්දේය. තම එක ඡුායාරූපයක්වත් එහි නැති බව වූ සිතිවිල්ල පද්මජාට දරාගත නොහැකි විය. ඇය තමාගේ කුඩා එහෙත් හැඟීම් අවුස්සනසුළු උඩුකයේ සිතුවමක් ගෙනැවිත් නේරුගේ නිදන කාමරයේ ගිනි උදුන ඉහළින් එල්ලූවාය. නේරුට ඇඳේ වැතිරී සිටියදී කෙළින්ම එය දර්ශනය වන ස්ථානය එය විය.’

නේරුගේ දේශපාලන භාවිතය ගැන විරුද්ධවාදීන්ගේ අදහස පිළිබඳ අත්දැකීමක් මතායි මෙසේ ගෙනහැර දක්වයි.

‘අහමඞ් කිඞ්වායි නින්දිත ජාතිවාදියෙක් විය. පාකිස්තානය ලෙස බෙදෙන සමයේ හා ජනතාවගේ සංක‍්‍රමණික අවධියේ පටෙල්, නේරුව විහිළුවට ලක් කරමින් සතුටු විය. වරෙක කොන්ග‍්‍රස් මන්ත‍්‍රීන් රැුස්ව සිටි අවස්ථාවක ඔහු පැවසුවේ ඉන්දියාවේ සිටින්නේ එක් මුස්ලිම් ජාතිකයකු බවයි. මන්තී‍්‍රන් පිරිස ඒ කවුදැයි ඇසුවේ පටෙල්, අහමඞ් කිඞ්වායිගේ නම පවසනු ඇතැයි බලාපොරොත්තුවෙනි. එහෙත් සියල්ලන් පුදුමයට පත්කරමින් ඔහුගේ පිළිතුර වූයේ ”මවුලානා නේරු” යනුවෙනුයි.’

17 පරිච්ෙඡ්දය මතායි වෙන්කර ඇත්තේ ඉන්දිරා ගාන්ධිගේ සැමියා වූ ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධිගේ විස්තර පවසන්නටය.

‘අලහබාද්හි පාසි ජාතික මද්‍යසාර වෙළෙන්දෙකුගේ පුතකු වූ ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධි, කමලා නේරු මැතිනියට සමීප වූයේ ස්වෙච්ඡුා කොන්ග‍්‍රස් ක‍්‍රියාකාරිකයකු ලෙසය. ඇය අලහබාද් ප‍්‍රදේශයේ දේශපාලන කටයුතු සඳහා පැමිණි විට ඇගේ සහායකයකු ලෙස ස්වෙච්ඡුාවෙන්ම ක‍්‍රියා කරමින් ඇය සමග ප‍්‍රදේශයේ සංචාරය කළේය. එහෙත් ඔහු අධ්‍යාපනය පිළිබඳ උනන්දුවක් දැක්වූවෙක් නොවීය. මුළු ජීවිත කාලය පුරාම ඔහුගේ අත්අකුරු කුඩා දරුවෙකුගේ මෙන් විය. 1935 දෙසැම්බර් අග භාගයේ පමණ - කමලා නේරුගේ අභාවයට දෙමසකට පමණ පෙර - ජර්මනියේ බැඞ්න්වෙයිලර්හිදී කමලා නේරු සිය සැමියා වූ ජවහර්ලාල් හා කතාබහක නියැළී සිටියාය. ඔවුන්ගේ සමීප මිතුරෙකු වූ නානු ද (ඒ.සී.එන්. නම්බියාර්* ඒ අවස්ථාවේ එහි විය. ඉන්දිරාගේ අනාගතය ගැන තමන් බොහෝ කරදරයෙන් සිටින බව කමලා එහිදී පැවසුවාය. ඇය තදින් ප‍්‍රකාශ කළේ ඉන්දිරා, ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධි හා විවාහ වනවාට තමා එකහෙළාම විරුද්ධ බවය. ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධි අවංක පුද්ගලයෙකු නොවන බව ඇගේ අදහස විය. අනෙක් අතින් ෆෙරෝස් කිසිදු අධ්‍යාපන හෝ වෘත්තීය සුදුසුකමක් නැති ඉන්දිරාට කිසිදු උදව්වක් කළ නොහැකි පුද්ගලයකු බවද ඇය පැවසුවාය. ආවේගයෙන් කතා කළ ඇය ඉක්මණින්ම වෙහෙසට පත්වූවාය. ආයාසයෙන් ඇය පැවසුවේ මගේ දරුවාගේ ජීවිතය අමාරුවේ දමන්නට නොහැකි බවයි. සියල්ල අසා සිටි නේරු කාරණය තමාට භාර දෙන ලෙස පවසා එතැනින් පිටව ගියේය. කමලා නානු දෙසට හැරී මෙසේ පැවසුවාය. ”ඔහු කිවූ දේ ඔබට ඇසුණා නොවේද? ඉන්දු (ඉන්දිරා* මා හැර වෙන කිසිවකුවත් කියන දේ අහන්නේ නැහැ. මට ඇය ෆෙරෝස්ගෙන් ඈත් කරන්නට පුළුවන්. ඒත් මගේ අවසානය ඉතා ළඟයි. ජවහර් කිසිදා ඇය ගැන බලන්නේ නැහැ. අවසානයේ ඇය ජීවිතය වරද්දා ගන්නවා.’

ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධි ගැන කමලා නේරුගේ මතය නිවැරදි බව පවසන මතායි ඊට උදාහරණ ගෙනහැර දක්වයි.

‘1947 දී ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධි ලක්නව් නැෂනල් හෙරල්ඞ් පත‍්‍රයේ ආධුනික මාධ්‍යවේදිනියක ලෙස වැඩ කළ තරුණියක හා පේ‍්‍රමයෙන් බැඳුනේය. මෙය දැනගත් රුසියාවේ වෙසෙන ඇගේ මව වූ පණ්ඩිට් මැතිනිය වහාම පැමිණ ඇගේ දියණිය මොස්කව් වෙත රැුගෙන ගියාය. ෆෙරොස්ගේ පේ‍්‍රම කතා ඉන් අවසන් වූයේ නැත. මෙවර ඔහු හාද වූයේ උත්තර් ප‍්‍රදේශ් ප‍්‍රාන්ත ආණ්ඩුවේ මුස්ලිම් ඇමතිවරයකුගේ දියණියක සමගය. ඒ වනවිට ඇය නවදිල්ලියේ සමස්ත ඉන්දීය ගුවන් විදුලි සේවයේ රැුකියාවක නියුතුව සිටියාය. දෙදෙනා විවාහ වීමට තීරණය කළහ. ෆෙරෝස් තම අරමුණ ඉන්දිරාට කියූ අතර ඇය පැවසුවේ තමන්ගෙන් එයට විරුද්ධත්වයක් නොමැති බවය. (ඒ වනවිට ඉන්දිරාට ෆෙරෝස්ව අන්තයටම එපාවී තිබිණි.* වැඩිමහල් දරුවා තම භාරයට ගැනීමට ෆෙරෝස්ට අවශ්‍ය වූ අතර ඉන්දිරා එයට දැඩිව විරුද්ධ වූවාය. ඒ අතර තම දියණියගේ දළු ලමින් තිබෙන රොමෑන්තික පේ‍්‍රමයේ් ප‍්‍රවෘත්තිය ලක්නව් වෙත කාන්දු වූයෙන් මුස්ලිම් ඇමැතිවරයා වික්ෂිප්ත විය. වහාම නවදිල්ලිය වෙත පැමිණි ඔහු දියණිය ආපසු රැුගෙන ගියේය.’

1957 සිට 1962 දක්වා ඉන්දීය රජයේ ආරක්ෂක ඇමැතිවරයා ලෙස හා ඉන්පසු නේරු හැරෙන්නට ඉන්දියාවේ බලවත්ම පුද්ගලයා ලෙස සැලකූ ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන් පිළිබඳ මතායිගේ හෙළිදරව්ව මෙසේය. මතායි හෙළි කරන මෙම සිද්ධිය සිදුවී ඇත්තේ ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා බි‍්‍රතාන්‍යයේ ඉන්දීය මහ කොමසාරිස්වරයා ලෙස සේවය කළ 1951 වර්ෂයේය.

”ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන්ගේ අර්බුදය එන්න එන්නම පාර්ලිමේන්තුව රත් කරමින් පැවතියේය. මේ අවස්ථාවේ රාජ්කුමාරි අම්රිට් කෞර් ඇතුළු ලන්ඩන් සිට පැමිණෙන්නන් ලන්ඩනයේ ඉන්දියා හවුස්හි නියම තත්ත්වය ගැන වාර්තා සැපයූවෝය. ඒ අනුව ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා අධිඋත්තේජන ඖෂධවල පිහිටෙන් නින්දිත ලිංගික ක‍්‍රියාකාරකම්වල යෙදෙනා බව ඔවුන් දැනුම් දුන්හ. 1951 ඔක්තෝබර් මාසයේ දිනක අගමැතිවරයා මට කතා කොට ලන්ඩනයට ගොස් විමර්ෂණයක් කොට ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා පිළිබඳ සියලූ තොරතුරු තමන්ට වාර්තා කරන ලෙස දැනුම් දුන්නේය.

ඒ අනුව ලන්ඩනයට ගිය මා එහිදී හමු වූ පළමු පුද්ගලයා ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණාගේ පැරණි මිතුරෙකු හා ආධාරකරුවකු වූ වෛද්‍ය හැන්ඩූ ය. ඔහු පැවසුවේ ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන් ලෙඩෙකු හා පිස්සු හැදීමට ඉතා ආසන්න වූවකු බවය. ඔහු තම ජවය පවත්වා ගැනීම පිණිස ලූමිනෝල් හා තවත් ජවාධික ඖෂධ පාවිච්චි කරන බව හෙතෙම පැවසීය. හැන්ඩූ තවදුරටත් පැවසූයේ අගමැතිවරයා ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා කොමසාරිස් කාර්යාලයේ තවමත් තබාගෙන සිටීම ගැන තමා පුදුම වන බවය.

ඉන්පසු මා බි‍්‍රතාන්‍ය වෛද්‍යවරයකු හමු වූ අතර ඔහු පැවසුවේ ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන් විද්‍යුත් කම්පන ප‍්‍රතිකාරය ලබමින් සිටිනා බවත් ඔහුත් සමග කාන්තා සාමාජිකාවක් ද ඊට සහභාගි වන බවත්ය. ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන් තදබල හිංසාවාදී උමතුවක් සහිත මානසික රෝගයකින් පෙලෙන බව ඔහුගේ අදහස විය.

මෙහි සඳහන් කළයුතු විශේෂ කාරණය නම් හිංසාවාදී උමතුවකින් පෙලෙන බව මතායි පවසන ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන් 1954 දී ඉන්දියාවේ ඉහළම සම්මානයක් වන ‘පද්ම විභූෂණ’ සම්මානයෙන් පිදුම් ලබන බවය. එපමණක් නොව ඔහු 1947 සිට 1952 දක්වා බි‍්‍රතාන්‍යයේ ඉන්දීය මහකොමසාරිස්වරයා ලෙසද, 1953 සිට 1956 දක්වා මදුරාසි ප‍්‍රාන්තය නියෝජනය කරමින් ද, 1956 හා 1957 කේරළ ප‍්‍රාන්තය නියෝජනය කරමින්ද, 1957 සිට 1967 දක්වා උතුරු මුම්බායි නියෝජනය කරමින් ඉන්දීය පාර්ලිමේන්තුවේ මන්ත‍්‍රී ධුර දැරීය. 1952 සිට 1962 දක්වා ඔහු එක්සත් ජාතීන්ගේ ඉන්දීය තාතාපති විය. එපමණක් නොව 1957 සිට 1962 දක්වා ඉන්දීය රජයේ බලවත්ම ඇමැති තනතුරක් වූ ආරක්ෂක ඇමැති පදවිය ද ඉසිලීය. මානසික රෝගියකුට දේශපාලනයේ යාහැකි දුර කෙතෙක්දැයි මතායි මෙහිදී නොසඟවා හෙළි කර තිබේ.

මේ සියල්ලටම වඩා ලොව පුරා මහත් ආන්දෝලනයක් ඇති කළේ මතායිගේ පොතෙහි ඉවත් කරන ලද පරිච්ෙඡ්දයකි. මතායි සිය ග‍්‍රන්ථයෙහි 153 පිටුවෙන් ආරම්භ වන 29 වන පරිච්ෙඡ්දය නම් කරන්නේ ‘ඇය’ යනුවෙනි. එහෙත් ”ඇය” පරිච්ෙඡ්දය ග‍්‍රන්ථයෙන් සම්පූර්ණයෙන්ම ඉවත් කොට තිබේ. කතුවරයාගේ අතිශය පෞද්ගලික අත්දැකීම් ඇතුළත් කොට ඞී. එච්. ලෝරන්ස් ශෛලියෙන් ලියූ ‘ඇය’ පරිච්ෙඡ්දය අවසන් මොහොතේ ග‍්‍රන්ථයෙන් ඉවත් කළ බව ප‍්‍රකාශකයන් විසින් සටහනක් තබා තිබේ. එහෙත් ඉවත් කළ ‘ඇය’ පරිච්ෙඡ්දය අනුමත නොකළ පිටපතක් ලෙස අන්තර්ජාලය ඔස්සේ කියවිය හැක්කේය.

ඔයැ ඛසෙැ දෙ ෂබාසර් භැයරම ඨ්බායස නම් ඉන්දිරා ගාන්ධිගේ චරිතාපදානය ලියන කැතරින් ෆ‍්‍රෑන්ක් ලේඛිකාව ‘ඇය’ පරිච්ෙඡ්දය ගැන මෙසේ පවසයි. ”හැත්තෑව දශකයේදී තම ස්වයංචරිතාපදානය ලියන මතායි, ඉන්දිරා ගාන්ධි හා තමන් වසර 12 ක පේ‍්‍රම සම්බන්ධයක් පැවැත්වූ බව පවසයි. ‘ඇය’ නම් වූ මේ පිළිබඳ ඇතුළත් පරිච්ෙඡ්දය පොත ප‍්‍රකාශයට පත් කරන්නට ආසන්නව තිබියදී මතායි විසින්ම ඉවත් කරගෙන තිබේ. ඒ වනවිට ඉන්දිරා බලයෙන් පහව සිටිය ද මේ ‘ඇය’ පරිච්ෙඡ්දය විනාශ කර ඇතැයි බොහෝ දෙනා විශ්වාස කළ අතර එය කවදා හෝ නැවත මතුවෙතැයි සමහරු සැක කළහ. නමුත් අසූව දශකයේ මුල් භාගයේදී මාතායිගේ මරණයෙන් වසර පහකට පසුව එය නැවත මතු වූයේ ඉන්දිරාගේ කාලයේදීමය. ඇගෙන් වෙන්වූ ලේලිය මේනකා ගාන්ධි ඒ හා සමගම එය ඉන්දිරාගේ සතුරන් අතර බෙදා හැරියාය.”

නිදහස් ඉන්දියාවේ ප‍්‍රථම අග‍්‍රාමාත්‍යවරයා වූ ශ‍්‍රී ජවහර්ලාල් නේරුගේ විශේෂ සහායකයාව 1946 සිට 1959 දක්වා සේවය කළ එම්. ඕ. මතායි එම අවධියේ නේරු ළඟට ඉන්දියාවේ සිටි බලවත්ම පුද්ගලයා විය. තීරණ ගැනීමේ ක‍්‍රියාවලියේ කේන්ද්‍රස්ථානය වූ අග‍්‍රාමාත්‍ය කාර්යාලයේ දශකයකට වැඩි කාලයක් තිස්සේ නේරු ගැන සියලූ දෙයක්ම දැන සිටි එකම තැනැත්තා මතායි ය. දේශපාලනය, කොන්ග‍්‍රස් නායකයන්, නිලධාරීන්, මුදල්, ගැහැණු, ලිංගික ක‍්‍රියා, මධ්‍යසාර ආදිය පිළිබඳ නේරුගේ උවමනා එපාකම් හා අතිශය පුද්ගලික කාරණා නිවැරදිව දැන සිටි එකම තැනැත්තා ඔහු විය. මතායි අවංකව හා සෘජුව සියල්ල හෙළි කරන අතර, ”මෙම පොත ලිවීමට පටන් ගැනීමට පෙර සම්ප‍්‍රදායික ස්වභාවයේ හා පෞද්ගලිකත්වයේ සියලූ පක්ෂපාතිත්වයන් මගේ මනසින් අත්හිටුවීමි. ඉතිහාසය පිළිබද මගේ යුතුකම පමණක් ඉතිරි කර ගතිමි. නේරුගේ ශෛලිය, ක‍්‍රිෂ්ණා මෙනන්ගේ පෞද්ගලික පුරුදු, ෆෙරෝස් ගාන්ධිගේ ගතිගුණ සහ මවුන්ට්බැට්න්ගේ දුර්වලතා පිළිබඳ මෙතෙක් ප‍්‍රසිද්ධ නොවූ සත්‍යයන් මෙහි බහා තිබේ. මේ කර්තව්‍යයේදී ශාස්ත‍්‍රී, ඉන්දිරා ගාන්ධි, පටෙල්, කිඞ්වායි, මවුලානා අසාද්, මවුන්ට්බැට්න් ආර්යාව ආදීන් දෙස නව ආලෝකයක් විහිදුවා සත්‍යය එළිය කර තිබේ. මේ කර්තව්‍යය නූතන ඉන්දියානු ඉතිහාසයට විශාල දායකත්වයක් සපයයි. මන්ද යත් බලවත් පුද්ගලයන් බොහෝ විට ජාතිය ගොඩනැගීමට හිතකර නොවන අරමුණු පිණිස නේරු හැසිරවීමට උත්සාහ කළ ආකාරය පිළිබඳ අවබෝධයක් ලබාදෙන බැවිනි’යි මතායි සිය පොතේ පෙරවදනේ පවසයි.

බලය අයුතු ලෙස පරිහරණය කළැයි කොමියුනිස්ට්වාදීන් විසින් ඔහුට එරෙහිව එල්ල කරන ලද පදනම් විරහිත චෝදනා නිසා කලකිරුණු මතායි 1959 දී සේවයෙන් ඉල්ලා අස්වූ අතර ඒ නිසාම අඳුරු වීදුරුවකින් වැසී තිබුණු ඉන්දීය දේශපාලනයේ තිත්ත ඇත්ත පිළිබඳ සත්‍යවාදී විස්තරයක් කිරීමට තමන් සුදුසුකම් ලැබූ බව ඔහු පවසයි.

නිමල් ෆ‍්‍රැන්සිස්

 

[banda065]

SHE written by M O Mathai
"SHE"

Foreword:This article has a short but important history. It was written on June 23, 1977 by no less a person than M.O. Mathai. He was then Indian Prime Minister Jawahar Lal Nehru's private secretary. Mathai was an intelligent and competent man from south India, a Catholic by religion like many south Indians, and quite courageous to have written the two well-known books alleged experiences of Nehru and his times, which became controversial.: (1) Reminiscences of the Nehru Age, and, (2) My Days with Nehru, where he has, for the first time, divulged many secrets of the high and the mighty of the Nehru years. He has also written the book SHE.

M.O. Mathai (1909-1981) was assistant to India's first Prime Minister, Jawaharlal Nehru. Mathai worked with the United States Army in India before becoming an assistant to Nehru in 1946. He resigned in 1959 following Communist allegations of misuse of power. One of Mathai's letters (UO No D/S13170 of 2/12/1954) digged out by the Delhi-based non-profit trust Mission Netaji had become controversial in 2006.[1] The letter indicated that the ashes of Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose was received in India in the 1950s. This information is contradictory to the Indian government's opinion that Bose's ashes are kept in Renkoji temple in Japan. Mathai died in 1981 of a heart attack in Madras at the age of 72 years.

However, the article that our readers are going to read, was not an ordinary article of a descriptive nature. It has many references to Mathai's personal interaction with Indira Gandhi (nee Nehru). The article was originally supposed to be a part of Mathai's book, 'Reminiscences of the Nehru Age' but for obvious reasons, at the last moment, it was left out of the book. I received a copy of the article, (which I am sharing with our readers), soon after its appearance in the form of an article by an unknown author but it does not take too much grey matter to guess who is writing and about whom. Our readers will judge. A great deal of what Mathai is telling us in these pages, are already known to intelligent, informed readers; however, these few pages are surely quite readable although the actors and actresses of the old drama are now gone, many with their past glory tarnished! It was to hide the tarnish that so much trouble had been taken to keep these few pages hidden from the general public, at the time. In India, the general public has always been and still is the outsider, never mind what the politicos say!
­
She has Cleopatra's nose, Pauline Bonaparte's eyes and the breasts of Venus. She has hair on her limbs which have to be shaven frequently. Physically and mentally she is more of a male than a female. I would call her a manly woman.I met her first in her ancestral home in the winter of 1945. She then had a baby son of crawling age and who was a cry baby. My first reaction was that she was a conceited girl with unhappiness written all over her face. Her second son, born in December, 1946, was an unwanted child. As a baby he had to be circumcised to remove a defect. By 1947 her cup of unhappiness was full and fortune took possession of her face.In the autumn of 1946 her father gave her a small Austin car. She wanted me to teach her driving. In the initial stages I used to take her to the Viceroy's bodyguard's Polo Ground for lessons. She was quick in learning. Then I stopped the driving lessons because she was getting into the advanced stage of pregnancy. I told her I didn't want her to take any risk going into the open roads learning driving. Her second son was born in the middle of December 1946. By the middle of February 1947 she was ready to resume driving lessons. We went into the roads and to Connaught Circus. Then I told her "you just imagine that you know everything, concentrate, consider the person driving a car from the opposite direction is a fool, and go along with confidence driving the car, take a round of Connaught Circus and come back". She did that and returned in triumph. The driving lessons ended there.Before the middle of 1947 she asked me to take her out to a cinema. From then on we used to go out for pictures as often as I was free - which was not frequent.

She looked forward to taking me out driving over the Ridge with the jungle on either side. She hated small cars. So we used to go in my car which was a Plymouth. She liked to go into the wilds where there were ruins. Drives to regions beyond Qutab Minar were favored. One day, during an aimless drive, she told me complainingly "You do not love me". I said "I do not know; I had not thought about it". By the autumn of 1947 I knew she had fallen headlong in love with me without my taking any initiative in the matter. Her face would light up on seeing me. She started talking to me about herself. She said that some time after her marriage, she discovered that her husband was not faithful to her. This came to her as a great shock because she married him in the teeth of opposition from every member of the family. She said she began to lose her saris, coats, blouses, shoes and handbags. She suspected the servants until she discovered some of her lost things on the persons of two women at a party. These women were known to be friendly with her husband. She also found out to which women her husband had given the books stolen from her book-shelves.She made it known rather discreetly what her intentions were about me. I told her I had two inhibitions: (1) I did not like to fool around with married women; (2) my loyalty to her father prohibited anything such as she had in mind. She was immediately forthcoming about No.1. She assured me that some time ago she had stopped having anything to do with her husband. She added: "I can no longer bear the thought of his touching me". She further confided in me "fortunately he has also gone impotent though he retained his attraction to women". About No. 2 she was angry with me and asked "What has my father got to do with it? Am I a minor?"
­
Since then she spent as much time with me as possible and ridiculed me for my attitude to her father in so far as she was concerned. But I continued to resist gently. I was not mentally prepared or reconciled as yet.On the 18th November 1947 she took me to her room and kissed me full on the lips and told me "I want to sleep with you; take me to the wilds tomorrow evening". I told her that I had very little experience with women. She said "all the better". So on the 19th, which was her birthday, we went driving out and chose a place in the wilderness. On our way back I told her that I had some revulsion about milk in her breasts (though she had stopped breast-feeding the child a while ago). Afterward, she did something about it and soon went completely dry. She discovered that I knew little about sex, and gave me two books, one of them by Dr. Abraham Stone about sex and female anatomy. I read them with profit.She was not promiscuous; neither did she need sex too frequently. But in the sex act she had all the artfulness of French women and Kerala Nair women combined. She loved prolonged kissing and being kissed in the same fashion. She had established a reputation of being cold and forbidding. She was nothing of the kind. It was only a pose as a feminine measure of self-protection. She was a passionate woman who was exceptionally good as a wriggler in bed. During the twelve years we were lovers, I was never satisfied with her.Progressively she became hostile to the fat female family friend who used to come to stay. Ever since she saw the family friend welcoming me on arrival with a hug and an innocent kiss on my cheek, she became jealous and livid with rage against the family friend. Occasionally the family friend used to ask me to take her and my "she" to a good cinema whenever there was one in town. My "she" could cleverly see to it that I did not sit near the family friend but only next to her as third in the row.

The day before the next time the family friend was expected to arrive "she" asked me to take her out into the wilds after sundown. In the car I asked her 'what is the big idea? I have some urgent work to do'. She replied 'as long as the fat one is here, I will keep away from you because I do not want you to touch me after she has touched you.' I assured her that I had absolutely no interest in the fat one. Eventually, 'she' got used to the fat one's friendly welcome and departure gestures to me.She tried hard to persuade me to occasionally go up to her room while her husband was there, sit down and talk to them both. I told her that I had no intention of practicing deception. So she used to bring him to my study occasionally.She used all kinds of devices to ensure that her children spent as little time with their father as possible. She told me that she did not want any influence of their father on them because she was convinced that his influence would be bad for them. She concluded by saying: "I do not want my children to grow up as champion liars." This was one of the reasons why her husband was shifted to a separate room.Once I mentioned to her something which her husband had told me. She said: "Don't believe a word of what he says. I have learnt it to my bitter cost".
­
She wrote to A.C.N. Nambiar, whom she had known personally for a long time and who was also a friend of her father and mother, asking for his opinion about divorcing her husband. She knew that Nambiar was a dear friend of mine. Nambiar replied to her to say that under certain circumstances it was preferable to have a clear break to living in make-believe. I did not encourage her in this matter, mostly for the sake of her father.One day, she told me that she could not bear the thought of being married to a Hindu. I told her "It is a compliment to the galaxy of great men Hinduism has produced through the ages".I never encouraged her to come to my bedroom. On one occasion she came. It was past midnight. I was fast asleep, having worked till midnight; she lay down beside me and gently woke me up by a kiss. I asked her "What is the matter?" She said: "I had to come". I did not know if she had been troubled in mind. I told her: "Let us lie here quietly and do nothing unless you want to". She said: "On this occasion, I only want to be with you". She lay there relaxed till about 4 in the morning, and gently tip-toed to her room upstairs. Before going away she told me: "I never told you that once I thought of committing suicide. Such thoughts do not come to me any more. You have given me back my happiness."
­
Once, early in our life of love, she told me, "I never knew what real sex was until I had you". At the height of her passion in bed, she would hold me tight and say "Oh, Bhupat, I love you". She loved to give and receive nick-names. She gave me the name of Bhupat the dacoit, and I promptly gave her the name of Putli, the dacoitess. In private we used to call each other by these names. About her protestations of love in her romantic excitement, I quoted to her once two passages from Byron's Don Juan:"Man's love is a man's life, a thing apart,It is a woman's whole existence.In her first passion woman loves her lover;In all others all she loves is love".She replied, "all right, I want you to tell me as often as possible, not in bed, that you love me". I tried my best to oblige her. In fact, there was no difficulty, for I had fallen deeply in love with her.One evening, I found her disturbed. When she saw me, she burst into tears. I asked her what had happened. She said that when she came from her dressing room to drink her usual glass of milk, she discovered that there was finely powdered glass in it. The powder was floating on the thick cream. At the first sip she immediately sensed it in her mouth and spat it out. She said that from her dressing room she heard her husband sneaking into her bedroom and making an exit. She controlled herself, put her arms round me and holding me tight, said: "Oh, Mackie, I love you; I am so glad you came up."
­
In the Constellation plans on our first visit abroad together, she was all excitement when we were in sight of Mont Blanc. She said softly to me, "I like the Queen Bee, I would like to make love high up in the air". I asked her:"Didn't you ever dream of soaring higher up like an eagle and surveying the world? I woke up from such a dream once and found myself on the floor, for I had fallen from the bed without breaking any bones". She knew I was pulling her leg. On reaching London, she found out the first free meal-time for her, and arranged for me to take her to a quiet restaurant. On reaching the restaurant, I asked her to order the food; I said I would have the same as hers with the addition of six large raw oysters on ice with appropriate sauce to begin with. She said she too would have it. The main dish she ordered was veal. She said "Ever since I arrived here, I have been dying to eat veal". I asked her if ever she had read Vatsayana's Kama Sutra. She said, "No, why?" I told her Vatsayana had prescribed veal for young couple for six months before marriage. She had not even read the Ramayana or the Mahabaharata. Her knowledge of the Ramayana was only what her grandmother had told her. In many ways, she was a denationalized person.
She did not like artificial birth-control aids. Once in the early fifties she got pregnant by me. She decided to have an abortion done. She went to the British High Commission doctor whom she knew personally; but he refused to help. So she went to her ancestral home and got in touch with a lady doctor whom she knew personally and in whom she had perfect confidence. On this trip she took her second son with her. After a fortnight the mother and the little son returned with the good news that the boy was cured of his defect in speech in the natural process. Earlier he could not pronounce "R", and the mother was worried about it; she was in frantic search for a speech-correction expert. On the day of her return, she told me that the whole thing came out without any medication or aid.Was the father aware of her attachment to me? The answer is in the affirmative. Every time he had to go out for dinner, he knew where to find her. Fifteen minutes before the time of departure, she would come fully decked up and sit in front of me in my study. At the stroke of the appointed time the father would pass my study and call her out.
­
In the winter of 1958 I happened to see something by sheer chance. Immediately after lunch, I went to convey some urgent information to her. She had already closed the door. I knocked; after about five minutes she half-opened the door and peeped out. I discovered that the curtains were drawn and a tall, youngish handsome, bearded man - a Brahmacahri - was in the room. I came away saying "I had something to tell you; but I shall say it later". That was the end of our relationship. She tried to make me believe several times that the scene I witnessed meant nothing more than some "yoga" and "spiritual" lessons. I gave her the definite impression that I was not interested in her explanations. Gradually she grew bitter against me. In fact, ultimately she became my deadly enemy - which constantly reminded me of the famous couplet of William Congrave:"Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned; nor hell a fury like a woman scorned."Within a fortnight of the incident I collected all her passionate letters and returned them to her. A year later I came across some more in my old papers. They were also returned to her.There is an erroneous belief among some that she and her husband came together during the last two years of the husband's life. Enough had happened in their lives that a reunion of hearts was not humanly possible. It is true that she was kind and considerate to him during his illness. Certain things were done during this period and more specially at the cremation and collection of the ashes of the husband and well advertised to give certain desired impressions. They were all for public consumption, for, by that time, she had emerged as a full-fledged political animal.

 

[banda065]

==================================================
Afterword:
A few clarifications, now that the readers had a look at the material presented by no less a person than M.O. Mathai himself on Indira (aka Maimuna Begum).Indira used to 'shave her limbs';
read that as 'her pubic hairs'. This is an Islamic practice forced today on the Afghan population by the Talibans in Afghanistan. There is nothing extraordinary in her statement that she would not like to get married to a Hindu man, although she used to have unauthorized sex with the Hindu 'brahmachari' in her own bed room.That her second son (the bastard son by Mohammad Yunus) Sanjay (aka Sanjiv) had circumcision is no secret now. Why blame an unknown and imagined 'defect'? It was done only to leave the seal of Islam, exactly as it had been done on Jawahar in the palace of the nawab of Oudh. Her inordinate love to eat veal can be tolerated but not the false explanation of circumcision. The entire Nehru family was of Islamic roots of unknown pedigree and they now plan to hand over the country today, to an ill-bred Catholic woman of unknown pedigree.That she had the abortion of her third baby, the one sired by Mathai, is not known by many. But the matter was hushed up by the excuse of 'speech-defect' of the baby son, Sanjiv (he was not name-changed to Sanjay as yet, after the car theft in London and to procure a separate Indian passport to evade the London police). Now we know that it is hard to pronounce the letter 'R'!That Firoz was a liar does not come to us a surprise! Didn't the school boys use to chant:"Gali gali men shor hai,Rajiv Gandhi chor hai?"And to think that no one had told them that the bastard son of Indira was the Bofors thief, which fact even any of the Indian leaders have not yet been able to decipher! And how could a fornication-prone thief like Firoz, hide the fact from a smart broad like Indira (aka Maimuna Begum), his own wife, for, it is widely accepted that Indira was indeed much smarter than Firoz.
­
That Indira had no or little knowledge of the Ramayana and the Mahabharata, was suspected by many. Did she know anything at all of the Koran? She was after all invited by the Saudi king to attend the Hajj ceremony at Mecca which information was also suppressed by our foolish media persons. If Indira learnt the rudiments of the Ramayana from her grandmother, the question still remains, which one? Jawahar's mother or Kamla Nehru's (nee Kaul) mother! We happen to know the name of Jawahar's mother; it was Thussu which was changed later to Swarup Rani. None of us seem to know the name of Kamla Kaul's mother.The fact of Firoz's cremation is very interesting. It was done only to fool the Hindus of India. This Sunni musalman son of Nawab Khan, the liquor vendor of Allahabad, converted to Catholicism by Sonia's petulance at Orbassano, Italy, had died and been cremated like the kafir Hindus but was not buried in accordance with the tenets of Islam. Then what happened to him? Did he go to the Jannat at all? Did he have the 72 houries and the 28 gilmans (pearl-like boys)? No one tells us that! It is amazing that the Indian media is headed by a bunch of idiots and that situation needs to be corrected as early as possible.
­

 

[araki]

thanks

SHE written by M O Mathai
"SHE"

Foreword:This article has a short but important history. It was written on June 23, 1977 by no less a person than M.O. Mathai. He was then Indian Prime Minister Jawahar Lal Nehru's private secretary. Mathai was an intelligent and competent man from south India, a Catholic by religion like many south Indians, and quite courageous to have written the two well-known books alleged experiences of Nehru and his times, which became controversial.: (1) Reminiscences of the Nehru Age, and, (2) My Days with Nehru, where he has, for the first time, divulged many secrets of the high and the mighty of the Nehru years. He has also written the book SHE.

M.O. Mathai (1909-1981) was assistant to India's first Prime Minister, Jawaharlal Nehru. Mathai worked with the United States Army in India before becoming an assistant to Nehru in 1946. He resigned in 1959 following Communist allegations of misuse of power. One of Mathai's letters (UO No D/S13170 of 2/12/1954) digged out by the Delhi-based non-profit trust Mission Netaji had become controversial in 2006.[1] The letter indicated that the ashes of Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose was received in India in the 1950s. This information is contradictory to the Indian government's opinion that Bose's ashes are kept in Renkoji temple in Japan. Mathai died in 1981 of a heart attack in Madras at the age of 72 years.

However, the article that our readers are going to read, was not an ordinary article of a descriptive nature. It has many references to Mathai's personal interaction with Indira Gandhi (nee Nehru). The article was originally supposed to be a part of Mathai's book, 'Reminiscences of the Nehru Age' but for obvious reasons, at the last moment, it was left out of the book. I received a copy of the article, (which I am sharing with our readers), soon after its appearance in the form of an article by an unknown author but it does not take too much grey matter to guess who is writing and about whom. Our readers will judge. A great deal of what Mathai is telling us in these pages, are already known to intelligent, informed readers; however, these few pages are surely quite readable although the actors and actresses of the old drama are now gone, many with their past glory tarnished! It was to hide the tarnish that so much trouble had been taken to keep these few pages hidden from the general public, at the time. In India, the general public has always been and still is the outsider, never mind what the politicos say!
­
She has Cleopatra's nose, Pauline Bonaparte's eyes and the breasts of Venus. She has hair on her limbs which have to be shaven frequently. Physically and mentally she is more of a male than a female. I would call her a manly woman.I met her first in her ancestral home in the winter of 1945. She then had a baby son of crawling age and who was a cry baby. My first reaction was that she was a conceited girl with unhappiness written all over her face. Her second son, born in December, 1946, was an unwanted child. As a baby he had to be circumcised to remove a defect. By 1947 her cup of unhappiness was full and fortune took possession of her face.In the autumn of 1946 her father gave her a small Austin car. She wanted me to teach her driving. In the initial stages I used to take her to the Viceroy's bodyguard's Polo Ground for lessons. She was quick in learning. Then I stopped the driving lessons because she was getting into the advanced stage of pregnancy. I told her I didn't want her to take any risk going into the open roads learning driving. Her second son was born in the middle of December 1946. By the middle of February 1947 she was ready to resume driving lessons. We went into the roads and to Connaught Circus. Then I told her "you just imagine that you know everything, concentrate, consider the person driving a car from the opposite direction is a fool, and go along with confidence driving the car, take a round of Connaught Circus and come back". She did that and returned in triumph. The driving lessons ended there.Before the middle of 1947 she asked me to take her out to a cinema. From then on we used to go out for pictures as often as I was free - which was not frequent.

She looked forward to taking me out driving over the Ridge with the jungle on either side. She hated small cars. So we used to go in my car which was a Plymouth. She liked to go into the wilds where there were ruins. Drives to regions beyond Qutab Minar were favored. One day, during an aimless drive, she told me complainingly "You do not love me". I said "I do not know; I had not thought about it". By the autumn of 1947 I knew she had fallen headlong in love with me without my taking any initiative in the matter. Her face would light up on seeing me. She started talking to me about herself. She said that some time after her marriage, she discovered that her husband was not faithful to her. This came to her as a great shock because she married him in the teeth of opposition from every member of the family. She said she began to lose her saris, coats, blouses, shoes and handbags. She suspected the servants until she discovered some of her lost things on the persons of two women at a party. These women were known to be friendly with her husband. She also found out to which women her husband had given the books stolen from her book-shelves.She made it known rather discreetly what her intentions were about me. I told her I had two inhibitions: (1) I did not like to fool around with married women; (2) my loyalty to her father prohibited anything such as she had in mind. She was immediately forthcoming about No.1. She assured me that some time ago she had stopped having anything to do with her husband. She added: "I can no longer bear the thought of his touching me". She further confided in me "fortunately he has also gone impotent though he retained his attraction to women". About No. 2 she was angry with me and asked "What has my father got to do with it? Am I a minor?"
­
Since then she spent as much time with me as possible and ridiculed me for my attitude to her father in so far as she was concerned. But I continued to resist gently. I was not mentally prepared or reconciled as yet.On the 18th November 1947 she took me to her room and kissed me full on the lips and told me "I want to sleep with you; take me to the wilds tomorrow evening". I told her that I had very little experience with women. She said "all the better". So on the 19th, which was her birthday, we went driving out and chose a place in the wilderness. On our way back I told her that I had some revulsion about milk in her breasts (though she had stopped breast-feeding the child a while ago). Afterward, she did something about it and soon went completely dry. She discovered that I knew little about sex, and gave me two books, one of them by Dr. Abraham Stone about sex and female anatomy. I read them with profit.She was not promiscuous; neither did she need sex too frequently. But in the sex act she had all the artfulness of French women and Kerala Nair women combined. She loved prolonged kissing and being kissed in the same fashion. She had established a reputation of being cold and forbidding. She was nothing of the kind. It was only a pose as a feminine measure of self-protection. She was a passionate woman who was exceptionally good as a wriggler in bed. During the twelve years we were lovers, I was never satisfied with her.Progressively she became hostile to the fat female family friend who used to come to stay. Ever since she saw the family friend welcoming me on arrival with a hug and an innocent kiss on my cheek, she became jealous and livid with rage against the family friend. Occasionally the family friend used to ask me to take her and my "she" to a good cinema whenever there was one in town. My "she" could cleverly see to it that I did not sit near the family friend but only next to her as third in the row.

The day before the next time the family friend was expected to arrive "she" asked me to take her out into the wilds after sundown. In the car I asked her 'what is the big idea? I have some urgent work to do'. She replied 'as long as the fat one is here, I will keep away from you because I do not want you to touch me after she has touched you.' I assured her that I had absolutely no interest in the fat one. Eventually, 'she' got used to the fat one's friendly welcome and departure gestures to me.She tried hard to persuade me to occasionally go up to her room while her husband was there, sit down and talk to them both. I told her that I had no intention of practicing deception. So she used to bring him to my study occasionally.She used all kinds of devices to ensure that her children spent as little time with their father as possible. She told me that she did not want any influence of their father on them because she was convinced that his influence would be bad for them. She concluded by saying: "I do not want my children to grow up as champion liars." This was one of the reasons why her husband was shifted to a separate room.Once I mentioned to her something which her husband had told me. She said: "Don't believe a word of what he says. I have learnt it to my bitter cost".
­
She wrote to A.C.N. Nambiar, whom she had known personally for a long time and who was also a friend of her father and mother, asking for his opinion about divorcing her husband. She knew that Nambiar was a dear friend of mine. Nambiar replied to her to say that under certain circumstances it was preferable to have a clear break to living in make-believe. I did not encourage her in this matter, mostly for the sake of her father.One day, she told me that she could not bear the thought of being married to a Hindu. I told her "It is a compliment to the galaxy of great men Hinduism has produced through the ages".I never encouraged her to come to my bedroom. On one occasion she came. It was past midnight. I was fast asleep, having worked till midnight; she lay down beside me and gently woke me up by a kiss. I asked her "What is the matter?" She said: "I had to come". I did not know if she had been troubled in mind. I told her: "Let us lie here quietly and do nothing unless you want to". She said: "On this occasion, I only want to be with you". She lay there relaxed till about 4 in the morning, and gently tip-toed to her room upstairs. Before going away she told me: "I never told you that once I thought of committing suicide. Such thoughts do not come to me any more. You have given me back my happiness."
­
Once, early in our life of love, she told me, "I never knew what real sex was until I had you". At the height of her passion in bed, she would hold me tight and say "Oh, Bhupat, I love you". She loved to give and receive nick-names. She gave me the name of Bhupat the dacoit, and I promptly gave her the name of Putli, the dacoitess. In private we used to call each other by these names. About her protestations of love in her romantic excitement, I quoted to her once two passages from Byron's Don Juan:"Man's love is a man's life, a thing apart,It is a woman's whole existence.In her first passion woman loves her lover;In all others all she loves is love".She replied, "all right, I want you to tell me as often as possible, not in bed, that you love me". I tried my best to oblige her. In fact, there was no difficulty, for I had fallen deeply in love with her.One evening, I found her disturbed. When she saw me, she burst into tears. I asked her what had happened. She said that when she came from her dressing room to drink her usual glass of milk, she discovered that there was finely powdered glass in it. The powder was floating on the thick cream. At the first sip she immediately sensed it in her mouth and spat it out. She said that from her dressing room she heard her husband sneaking into her bedroom and making an exit. She controlled herself, put her arms round me and holding me tight, said: "Oh, Mackie, I love you; I am so glad you came up."
­
In the Constellation plans on our first visit abroad together, she was all excitement when we were in sight of Mont Blanc. She said softly to me, "I like the Queen Bee, I would like to make love high up in the air". I asked her:"Didn't you ever dream of soaring higher up like an eagle and surveying the world? I woke up from such a dream once and found myself on the floor, for I had fallen from the bed without breaking any bones". She knew I was pulling her leg. On reaching London, she found out the first free meal-time for her, and arranged for me to take her to a quiet restaurant. On reaching the restaurant, I asked her to order the food; I said I would have the same as hers with the addition of six large raw oysters on ice with appropriate sauce to begin with. She said she too would have it. The main dish she ordered was veal. She said "Ever since I arrived here, I have been dying to eat veal". I asked her if ever she had read Vatsayana's Kama Sutra. She said, "No, why?" I told her Vatsayana had prescribed veal for young couple for six months before marriage. She had not even read the Ramayana or the Mahabaharata. Her knowledge of the Ramayana was only what her grandmother had told her. In many ways, she was a denationalized person.
She did not like artificial birth-control aids. Once in the early fifties she got pregnant by me. She decided to have an abortion done. She went to the British High Commission doctor whom she knew personally; but he refused to help. So she went to her ancestral home and got in touch with a lady doctor whom she knew personally and in whom she had perfect confidence. On this trip she took her second son with her. After a fortnight the mother and the little son returned with the good news that the boy was cured of his defect in speech in the natural process. Earlier he could not pronounce "R", and the mother was worried about it; she was in frantic search for a speech-correction expert. On the day of her return, she told me that the whole thing came out without any medication or aid.Was the father aware of her attachment to me? The answer is in the affirmative. Every time he had to go out for dinner, he knew where to find her. Fifteen minutes before the time of departure, she would come fully decked up and sit in front of me in my study. At the stroke of the appointed time the father would pass my study and call her out.
­
In the winter of 1958 I happened to see something by sheer chance. Immediately after lunch, I went to convey some urgent information to her. She had already closed the door. I knocked; after about five minutes she half-opened the door and peeped out. I discovered that the curtains were drawn and a tall, youngish handsome, bearded man - a Brahmacahri - was in the room. I came away saying "I had something to tell you; but I shall say it later". That was the end of our relationship. She tried to make me believe several times that the scene I witnessed meant nothing more than some "yoga" and "spiritual" lessons. I gave her the definite impression that I was not interested in her explanations. Gradually she grew bitter against me. In fact, ultimately she became my deadly enemy - which constantly reminded me of the famous couplet of William Congrave:"Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned; nor hell a fury like a woman scorned."Within a fortnight of the incident I collected all her passionate letters and returned them to her. A year later I came across some more in my old papers. They were also returned to her.There is an erroneous belief among some that she and her husband came together during the last two years of the husband's life. Enough had happened in their lives that a reunion of hearts was not humanly possible. It is true that she was kind and considerate to him during his illness. Certain things were done during this period and more specially at the cremation and collection of the ashes of the husband and well advertised to give certain desired impressions. They were all for public consumption, for, by that time, she had emerged as a full-fledged political animal.