100 ways to kill yourself - මැරෙන්න ක්රම 100ක්
1) try soaking your head in a bucket of ammonia. in 5 minutes, if you are
still alive, repeat as necessary till dead...
2) cut your balls off (if you have them)
3) cut your head off with a razor blade and go into extreme ecstacy
4) drink a gallon of JD with a dab of Nitrogrycerin and jump up and down
vigirously
5) fart in a balloon and light a match
6) eat the stuff between your toes with a teaspoon of pepper and a drop of
vinegar
7) fart in front of the meanest, fattest, teacher while bending over to
pick up the pencil that you mistakenly (yeah, right!) dropped
8) eat shit and die.....
9) try inhaling a fart right out of your own asshole....
10) fuck Ronald Reagan-
11) or his wife.....
12) try to do the running long jump over the Hudson river
13) or maybe try skydiving underwater......
14) try to katch the first nuclear missle headed towards the U.S.A.
15) sit on a pitchfork
16) cement yourself into the Great Wall of China
17) attach yourself to the Good Year Blimp
18) buy a $400 piece of software and then find it up on the AE the next day
19) plug your ass with a cork and stand at the edge of a cliff and fart
20) slide down a banister with a long, fat spike at the end
21) slide down a razor blade
22) fuck a slut that has a pair of scisssors up her cunt
23) take a bath with 1 (or 2) fingers in an electrical socket
24) sit on an Exacto knife and spin!
25) cross a highway blindfolded
26) inspect the Space Shuttle's engines during takeoff
27) do whatever your parents say...
28) roll down the Empire State Building's stairway in a sleeping bag
29) sleep late on a Saturday....
30) not seeing that bullet heading straight between your eyes
31) "Hey look! What's that knife in my stomach?"
32) "No, no please don't! Please don't push me off this ----", smack!
splash! gargle... thump.
33) eat that cake that's been sitting in the fridge for 2 months
34) "Hey Jack, eat that colony of green stuff moving across your plate!"
35) Stick a straw in a septic tank and take a sip.
36) try skiing over a tree (or around it, or under it, or into it)
37) try katching a spiked boomerang...
38) try picking your brain via your nose...
39) squeeze yourself into a microwave (and don't forget to turn it on [duh!])
40) listen to E.F. Hutton
41) leap off a 20 story building onto a sharpened steel sewage grating
42) sleep at the bottom of an elevator shaft
43) stick your hand ,or foot if desired, in a food processor
44) get your ear caught in the spokes of your bike while riding down a hill
45) stick your hand in a paper shredder
46) have your car compacted at a junkyard, and give the guy a buck to let you
sleep in it
47) sit on a scorpion
48) get your head caught in a beehive
49) sleep in your washing machine (or dryer for extra fluffyness)
50) loose the only key to your father's brand new Rolls Royce
51) sleigh ride off your roof
52) straddle a 'No Parking' sign
53) drink a gallon of gasoline and have some tabasco sauce
54) fall asleep at the bottom of a garbage incinerator [you know, the shutes
you throw the garbage down if you live in a high rise]
55) skydive into an exploding volcano (if you live through this, contact me
on the Circus BBS 201-592-0456)
56) cement yourself into the middle of a highway
57) volunteer to be a subway brake
58) light a smoke bomb and swallow.!$%&*!^%*#&$*?%!@.?
59) drag yourself along the road, hanging on the back of a Mack truck
60) wait at the bottom of the Empire State Building while your friend drops a
spear off the top, straight through the center of your head (and the rest of
you)
61) glue yourself to the way bottom of an ocean liner [while it's going]...
62) lounge in a pool obNasoline and light that big fat cigar in your mouth
63) climb up the telefone pole and lick the electric wires
64) look in the mirror [ha ha! just kiddin'!]
65) go to Russia
66) slingshot yourself into the Sun [not quite..]
67) put some iodine crystals in a whoopy cushion - sit on it!
68) volunteer to be a nuclear warhead
69) <- eat your girlfriend out when she uses a sulfuric acid douche
70) eat a piece of Uranium
71) lick a scientist's chemical lab table before he cleans up!
72) get your nose caught in an exhaust pipe while the car is running
73) go swimming while wearing Mr.T's heavy jewelery around thy neck
74) run a razor blade down the middle of your face!
75) take a chainsaw, cut your head into thirds
76) get caught on the nose of the Concorde
77) in your science class, turn on all the gas outlets, light a match
78) get drunk and be processed through a doughnut molding factory
79) volunteer to rent out your head as a soccer ball
80) eat your school cafeteria's poison of the day
81) slurp nuclear waste
82) stab yourself in 100 (and 1) places
83) try to swallow a (King) Cobra
84) get your arm caught in the wheel of a train
85) your running 40 m.p.h. - your foot katches onto a bloody sewage grating
- you trip and fall - 40 m.p.h. - on your face!
86) bend both your knees and elbows - backwards! [snap!]
87) ski off a cliff
88) shuv a pipebomb up your ass
89) fart and smell up a crowded elevator [watch the reaction!] - announce
that you let it go - kiss your ass goodbye!
90) cut your circulation off with a giant Band-Aid (tm)
91) mail yourself to the smallest P.O. box in the country
92) pick a fight with Sylvester Stallone
93) try to catch a Roadrunner
94) beat the shit out of yourself [take a spaz!]
95) you take a final relaxing dip in a pool of gasoline - you hang yourself
from a branch of a tree - light the bonfire under you!
96) tie each of your ankles to the bumper of 2 cars and let them back out
in different directions - Slowly!
97) go to your local deli and by mistake put your best hand on the meat
slicer, and of course turn it on - press down firmly as the slices of your hand
fall neatly into the palm of the other hand
98) try writing this G-Phile
99) put it this way - commit suicide!
100) Do all of the above [in order!]
100 WAYS TO KILL YOURSELF
Slit your wrists.
Drink cleaning supplies.
Put your dad's rifle in your mouth and shoot.
Cut yourself along several major arteries and slowly bleed to death.
Fill the bathtub up with hot water and get in. Go underwater & breathe until I say stop.
Give yourself a homemade tattoo with toxic silver pen.
Fill the bathtub up. Grab a toaster & plug it in. Get in the bathtub and bring the toaster with you. Push down the button & enjoy!
Boil several gallons of water on the stove and "accidentally" spill it all on yourself.
Bash your head in with a hammer.
Get an axe from the woodpile & split yourself in half.
Use your telekinetic powers to make the house fall apart.
Tease the elevator by not letting it close until it buzzes loudly. Stand in the door's way and let it close.
Break a mirror. Take two sharp pieces of the glass and shove them in your eyes, hard and deep.
Shove a Chef's knife up your butt.
Kill someone else and plead for death by lethal injection.
Break a bottle of wine on a table and shove it in your stomach.
Have your best friend run you over with a steamroller.
Turn on the iron until water dances on surface. Put it on several places on your body, keeping it in each place for at least 45 seconds.
Jump off a building, aiming carefully to impale yourself on a lamppost.
Drive a wooden stake in your heart.
Induce vomiting until you black out and slip into a coma. This coma should last for several months, in which time your family will certainly decide to pull the plug.
Put your pinky, as well as any other digits that will fit, into an electrical socket.
Purposely catch your clothing in the escalator at a local mall and fight off anyone who tries to help. Enjoy the ride!
Swallow vanilla bath beads.
Drop a lit match down your throat.
Eat three tubes of toothpaste - and I'm not talking about trial size.
Hang yourself in your closet with an electrical cord.
Unbend a coat hanger and slowly & carefully shove it up your nose.
Crash a car into a department store window displaying a nativity scene. Merry Christmas!
Lodge your head in the toilet bowl and flush mercilessly.
Get your hand caught in the CD-ROM drive and attempt to cut it off with a dull pocketknife.
Make a pipe bomb and blow up your house with you inside, of course.
Stuff toilet paper down your throat until you choke.
Eat baby powder.
Eat deodorant.
Take a walk in the ghetto with a giant boom box blasting Vanilla Ice.
Anger a cannibal.
Drown yourself in a spoon full of water.
Get a friend to throw a few CDs Frisbee-style at your stomach and throat.
Swallow fifteen razor blades.
Drink 2 bottles of cough syrup.
Lock yourself in a room. After you've eaten the carpet and peeled the paint off the walls for a snack, you'll eventually starve.
Swerve into the left rear wheels of a moving transfer truckfon your bike.
Break a battery open and pour it into a glass of Dr. Pepper and drink it.
Live on top of an active volcano.
Piss off O.J. Simpson.
Eat a string of Christmas Tree lights.
Give yourself a million paper cutsfif the paper cuts don't kill you, the counting will.
Nail yourself to the side of a federal building.
Scalp yourself. If you're not dead, make photocopies.
Cry your eyes outfliterally.
Burn plastic and breathe in the toxic fumes.
Charge into a big screen TV.
Lag behind when participating in a Bull Run.
Walk around in downtown New Jersey with a Target store shirt on.
Smash your head in the safe door again & again & againf
Spray a bottle of air freshener up your nose and inhale at the same time.
Eat a dog with heartworms raw.
Strategically place yourself in the middle of a very busy intersection at rush hour during daylight savings time while wearing a tight, black jumpsuit, being ever so careful to hit every car you see.
Go to a horse race and jump out in front of the leading horse screaming at the top of your lungs, "I'm a pony! I'm a pony!"
Make like Sonny Bono when on a skiing trip.
Get run over by an ostrich.
Get naked and lay on 12 150-watt light bulbs, then flip the switch.
Cut off all your fingers then write a ten-page report on "Polyester versus Cotton Fabrics" with the stubs.
Get pregnant and then have your mother perform an emergency C-section just for kicks.
Jam a toothbrush in your bellybutton.
Brush your teeth with a MACH 3 razor.
Drill a hole in your head.
Find a huge pine tree. Cut it down with a chainsaw while standing in its falling path.
Skinny-dip in a shark tank with your favorite rubber ducky.
Drive with a rabid monkey in your back seat.
Play NASCAR with an unsuspecting fellow driver.
Jump off the balcony in a school auditorium.
Smash your head through a wooden door, making sure you get plenty of splinters.
Jump in the way of a moving subway train.
Drip hot wax all over your body, then light matches and light your feet on fire. The flames will rise and consume your entire body, but before you do that, make sure you drip hot wax in your eyes & let it harden.
Do back flips in a mosh pit.
Attempt to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
Jump out of a moving bus window and do shoulder-rolls across the highway until you get run over.
Always use the wrong tool for the job.
Float on your back in the Anaconda River and wait.
Get in a pool with piranhas and have them tear off your flesh bit by bit, eating you alive.
Wedge yourself in the doggy-entrance on the garage door and have a friend press the "garage open" button.
Use a chain saw to cut out pictures.
Shove a TV antenna in one ear & out the other.
Strangle yourself with your best necklace.
Bite your arm and suck & swallow the blood. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. 88. Perform self-quadruple bypass surgery.
Take out your own spleen, cook it for 2 minutes in the microwave, and eat it.
Cut yourself up and feed as much of you as possible to the family dog.
Cut off your limbs and put them in the crock-pot for your family to find. If your crock-pot isn't large enough, put extra flesh in the freezer for later.
Swan dive into the 10-gallon fish tank.
Give yourself a buzz-cut with bush shears.
Gather up a group of friends to push all your pressure points at the same time.
Make believe you're in a psychiatric facility with padded walls when you're really in a steel cage.
Straddle a neon sign. Don't let go, no matter what people tell you.
Go swimming in an oil spill. Don't forget to open your eyes under water!
Smash your porcelain "Precious Moments" dolls in the middle of the street and consume the large pieces left over.
Roll around nude in the street at noon.
Drink paint. Eat the stick you stirred the paint with. Drink paint thinner to wash it down.
Take all the pills in your medicine cabinet, along with at least one shot of every alcoholic beverage known to man and take a little nap. Don't bother waking up.
Code:
[CENTER]http://www.almostsmart.com/forums/showthread.php?t=8014[/CENTER]1) try soaking your head in a bucket of ammonia. in 5 minutes, if you are
still alive, repeat as necessary till dead...
2) cut your balls off (if you have them)
3) cut your head off with a razor blade and go into extreme ecstacy
4) drink a gallon of JD with a dab of Nitrogrycerin and jump up and down
vigirously
5) fart in a balloon and light a match
6) eat the stuff between your toes with a teaspoon of pepper and a drop of
vinegar
7) fart in front of the meanest, fattest, teacher while bending over to
pick up the pencil that you mistakenly (yeah, right!) dropped
8) eat shit and die.....
9) try inhaling a fart right out of your own asshole....
10) fuck Ronald Reagan-
11) or his wife.....
12) try to do the running long jump over the Hudson river
13) or maybe try skydiving underwater......
14) try to katch the first nuclear missle headed towards the U.S.A.
15) sit on a pitchfork
16) cement yourself into the Great Wall of China
17) attach yourself to the Good Year Blimp
18) buy a $400 piece of software and then find it up on the AE the next day
19) plug your ass with a cork and stand at the edge of a cliff and fart
20) slide down a banister with a long, fat spike at the end
21) slide down a razor blade
22) fuck a slut that has a pair of scisssors up her cunt
23) take a bath with 1 (or 2) fingers in an electrical socket
24) sit on an Exacto knife and spin!
25) cross a highway blindfolded
26) inspect the Space Shuttle's engines during takeoff
27) do whatever your parents say...
28) roll down the Empire State Building's stairway in a sleeping bag
29) sleep late on a Saturday....
30) not seeing that bullet heading straight between your eyes
31) "Hey look! What's that knife in my stomach?"
32) "No, no please don't! Please don't push me off this ----", smack!
splash! gargle... thump.
33) eat that cake that's been sitting in the fridge for 2 months
34) "Hey Jack, eat that colony of green stuff moving across your plate!"
35) Stick a straw in a septic tank and take a sip.
36) try skiing over a tree (or around it, or under it, or into it)
37) try katching a spiked boomerang...
38) try picking your brain via your nose...
39) squeeze yourself into a microwave (and don't forget to turn it on [duh!])
40) listen to E.F. Hutton
41) leap off a 20 story building onto a sharpened steel sewage grating
42) sleep at the bottom of an elevator shaft
43) stick your hand ,or foot if desired, in a food processor
44) get your ear caught in the spokes of your bike while riding down a hill
45) stick your hand in a paper shredder
46) have your car compacted at a junkyard, and give the guy a buck to let you
sleep in it
47) sit on a scorpion
48) get your head caught in a beehive
49) sleep in your washing machine (or dryer for extra fluffyness)
50) loose the only key to your father's brand new Rolls Royce
51) sleigh ride off your roof
52) straddle a 'No Parking' sign
53) drink a gallon of gasoline and have some tabasco sauce
54) fall asleep at the bottom of a garbage incinerator [you know, the shutes
you throw the garbage down if you live in a high rise]
55) skydive into an exploding volcano (if you live through this, contact me
on the Circus BBS 201-592-0456)
56) cement yourself into the middle of a highway
57) volunteer to be a subway brake
58) light a smoke bomb and swallow.!$%&*!^%*#&$*?%!@.?
59) drag yourself along the road, hanging on the back of a Mack truck
60) wait at the bottom of the Empire State Building while your friend drops a
spear off the top, straight through the center of your head (and the rest of
you)
61) glue yourself to the way bottom of an ocean liner [while it's going]...
62) lounge in a pool obNasoline and light that big fat cigar in your mouth
63) climb up the telefone pole and lick the electric wires
64) look in the mirror [ha ha! just kiddin'!]
65) go to Russia
66) slingshot yourself into the Sun [not quite..]
67) put some iodine crystals in a whoopy cushion - sit on it!
68) volunteer to be a nuclear warhead
69) <- eat your girlfriend out when she uses a sulfuric acid douche
70) eat a piece of Uranium
71) lick a scientist's chemical lab table before he cleans up!
72) get your nose caught in an exhaust pipe while the car is running
73) go swimming while wearing Mr.T's heavy jewelery around thy neck
74) run a razor blade down the middle of your face!
75) take a chainsaw, cut your head into thirds
76) get caught on the nose of the Concorde
77) in your science class, turn on all the gas outlets, light a match
78) get drunk and be processed through a doughnut molding factory
79) volunteer to rent out your head as a soccer ball
80) eat your school cafeteria's poison of the day
81) slurp nuclear waste
82) stab yourself in 100 (and 1) places
83) try to swallow a (King) Cobra
84) get your arm caught in the wheel of a train
85) your running 40 m.p.h. - your foot katches onto a bloody sewage grating
- you trip and fall - 40 m.p.h. - on your face!
86) bend both your knees and elbows - backwards! [snap!]
87) ski off a cliff
88) shuv a pipebomb up your ass
89) fart and smell up a crowded elevator [watch the reaction!] - announce
that you let it go - kiss your ass goodbye!
90) cut your circulation off with a giant Band-Aid (tm)
91) mail yourself to the smallest P.O. box in the country
92) pick a fight with Sylvester Stallone
93) try to catch a Roadrunner
94) beat the shit out of yourself [take a spaz!]
95) you take a final relaxing dip in a pool of gasoline - you hang yourself
from a branch of a tree - light the bonfire under you!
96) tie each of your ankles to the bumper of 2 cars and let them back out
in different directions - Slowly!
97) go to your local deli and by mistake put your best hand on the meat
slicer, and of course turn it on - press down firmly as the slices of your hand
fall neatly into the palm of the other hand
98) try writing this G-Phile
99) put it this way - commit suicide!
100) Do all of the above [in order!]
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Code:
[CENTER]http://xxcessxx.blogspot.com/2007/07/100-ways-to-kill-yourself.html[/CENTER]100 WAYS TO KILL YOURSELF
Slit your wrists.
Drink cleaning supplies.
Put your dad's rifle in your mouth and shoot.
Cut yourself along several major arteries and slowly bleed to death.
Fill the bathtub up with hot water and get in. Go underwater & breathe until I say stop.
Give yourself a homemade tattoo with toxic silver pen.
Fill the bathtub up. Grab a toaster & plug it in. Get in the bathtub and bring the toaster with you. Push down the button & enjoy!
Boil several gallons of water on the stove and "accidentally" spill it all on yourself.
Bash your head in with a hammer.
Get an axe from the woodpile & split yourself in half.
Use your telekinetic powers to make the house fall apart.
Tease the elevator by not letting it close until it buzzes loudly. Stand in the door's way and let it close.
Break a mirror. Take two sharp pieces of the glass and shove them in your eyes, hard and deep.
Shove a Chef's knife up your butt.
Kill someone else and plead for death by lethal injection.
Break a bottle of wine on a table and shove it in your stomach.
Have your best friend run you over with a steamroller.
Turn on the iron until water dances on surface. Put it on several places on your body, keeping it in each place for at least 45 seconds.
Jump off a building, aiming carefully to impale yourself on a lamppost.
Drive a wooden stake in your heart.
Induce vomiting until you black out and slip into a coma. This coma should last for several months, in which time your family will certainly decide to pull the plug.
Put your pinky, as well as any other digits that will fit, into an electrical socket.
Purposely catch your clothing in the escalator at a local mall and fight off anyone who tries to help. Enjoy the ride!
Swallow vanilla bath beads.
Drop a lit match down your throat.
Eat three tubes of toothpaste - and I'm not talking about trial size.
Hang yourself in your closet with an electrical cord.
Unbend a coat hanger and slowly & carefully shove it up your nose.
Crash a car into a department store window displaying a nativity scene. Merry Christmas!
Lodge your head in the toilet bowl and flush mercilessly.
Get your hand caught in the CD-ROM drive and attempt to cut it off with a dull pocketknife.
Make a pipe bomb and blow up your house with you inside, of course.
Stuff toilet paper down your throat until you choke.
Eat baby powder.
Eat deodorant.
Take a walk in the ghetto with a giant boom box blasting Vanilla Ice.
Anger a cannibal.
Drown yourself in a spoon full of water.
Get a friend to throw a few CDs Frisbee-style at your stomach and throat.
Swallow fifteen razor blades.
Drink 2 bottles of cough syrup.
Lock yourself in a room. After you've eaten the carpet and peeled the paint off the walls for a snack, you'll eventually starve.
Swerve into the left rear wheels of a moving transfer truckfon your bike.
Break a battery open and pour it into a glass of Dr. Pepper and drink it.
Live on top of an active volcano.
Piss off O.J. Simpson.
Eat a string of Christmas Tree lights.
Give yourself a million paper cutsfif the paper cuts don't kill you, the counting will.
Nail yourself to the side of a federal building.
Scalp yourself. If you're not dead, make photocopies.
Cry your eyes outfliterally.
Burn plastic and breathe in the toxic fumes.
Charge into a big screen TV.
Lag behind when participating in a Bull Run.
Walk around in downtown New Jersey with a Target store shirt on.
Smash your head in the safe door again & again & againf
Spray a bottle of air freshener up your nose and inhale at the same time.
Eat a dog with heartworms raw.
Strategically place yourself in the middle of a very busy intersection at rush hour during daylight savings time while wearing a tight, black jumpsuit, being ever so careful to hit every car you see.
Go to a horse race and jump out in front of the leading horse screaming at the top of your lungs, "I'm a pony! I'm a pony!"
Make like Sonny Bono when on a skiing trip.
Get run over by an ostrich.
Get naked and lay on 12 150-watt light bulbs, then flip the switch.
Cut off all your fingers then write a ten-page report on "Polyester versus Cotton Fabrics" with the stubs.
Get pregnant and then have your mother perform an emergency C-section just for kicks.
Jam a toothbrush in your bellybutton.
Brush your teeth with a MACH 3 razor.
Drill a hole in your head.
Find a huge pine tree. Cut it down with a chainsaw while standing in its falling path.
Skinny-dip in a shark tank with your favorite rubber ducky.
Drive with a rabid monkey in your back seat.
Play NASCAR with an unsuspecting fellow driver.
Jump off the balcony in a school auditorium.
Smash your head through a wooden door, making sure you get plenty of splinters.
Jump in the way of a moving subway train.
Drip hot wax all over your body, then light matches and light your feet on fire. The flames will rise and consume your entire body, but before you do that, make sure you drip hot wax in your eyes & let it harden.
Do back flips in a mosh pit.
Attempt to leap tall buildings in a single bound.
Jump out of a moving bus window and do shoulder-rolls across the highway until you get run over.
Always use the wrong tool for the job.
Float on your back in the Anaconda River and wait.
Get in a pool with piranhas and have them tear off your flesh bit by bit, eating you alive.
Wedge yourself in the doggy-entrance on the garage door and have a friend press the "garage open" button.
Use a chain saw to cut out pictures.
Shove a TV antenna in one ear & out the other.
Strangle yourself with your best necklace.
Bite your arm and suck & swallow the blood. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. 88. Perform self-quadruple bypass surgery.
Take out your own spleen, cook it for 2 minutes in the microwave, and eat it.
Cut yourself up and feed as much of you as possible to the family dog.
Cut off your limbs and put them in the crock-pot for your family to find. If your crock-pot isn't large enough, put extra flesh in the freezer for later.
Swan dive into the 10-gallon fish tank.
Give yourself a buzz-cut with bush shears.
Gather up a group of friends to push all your pressure points at the same time.
Make believe you're in a psychiatric facility with padded walls when you're really in a steel cage.
Straddle a neon sign. Don't let go, no matter what people tell you.
Go swimming in an oil spill. Don't forget to open your eyes under water!
Smash your porcelain "Precious Moments" dolls in the middle of the street and consume the large pieces left over.
Roll around nude in the street at noon.
Drink paint. Eat the stick you stirred the paint with. Drink paint thinner to wash it down.
Take all the pills in your medicine cabinet, along with at least one shot of every alcoholic beverage known to man and take a little nap. Don't bother waking up.
