Anarkali is on on a plane to New York. (She is the PR representitive after all) She is sitting in the first class section, but her ticket says that she should be in the coach section. A flight attendant realizes the Anarkali's mistake and asks her politely to move. Anarkali won't move. All she says is,
"I'm Anarkali, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
The flight attendant goes and tells all of the other flight attendants. They all try to persuade Anarkali to move, but she won't move. All she says is,
"I'm Anarkali, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
The flight attendants go and tell the pilot about the obnoxious bimbo. They tell him the only thing that she says. He puts the plane on auto-pilot and whispers something in Anarkali's ear. Immediately, she gets up and moves to her normal seat. Then the pilot goes back to fly the plane. The flight attendants are all very curious about how the pilot made Anarkali move so quickly.
They ask him and he says, "Oh, it was easy. All I had to do was tell her that the first class section wasn't going to New York!"
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Anarkali thinks her boyfriend is cheating on her. She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly, and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of another woman. Anarkali gets very angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does, she is overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and points to her head. The boyfriend yells, "NO, honey, don't do it!"
She replies "Shut up, you're next."
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One day, Anarkali and a friend were walking along a beach. Suddenly, a bird flies over and craps on the friend.
The friend tells Anar, "Quick, go get some toilet paper!"
Anarkali replies, "By the time I get back, the bird will be gone!"
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What does Anarkali and beer bottles have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up!
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What do you do when Anarkali throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
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How do you get Anarkali's eyes to sparkle?
Shine a flashlight in her ear?
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If a Blonde and Anarkali both jumped off a building at the same time, who would land first?
The Blonde.....Anarkali would have to stop and ask directions.
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Anarkali couldn't call 911 because she couldn't find the 11 button on the phone.
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Anarkali thought the capital of California was "C".
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Q: Why did Anarkali smile everytime there was a flash of lightning?
A: She thought someone was taking her picture.
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Q: Did you hear when Anarkali attempted to drive to EuroDisney?
A: She saw a sign saying: "EuroDisney Left" so she went home.
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Q: What did Anarkali name her pet Zebra?
A: Spot.
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Q: Why did Anarkali get tire tread marks on her stomach?
A: From crawling across the street when the pedestrian sign said "DON'T WALK"
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Q: What do you see when you look directly into Anarkali's eyes?
A: The back of her head.
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Q: What did Anarkali do when she went to a film that had an NC-17 (no under 17's) rating?
A: Went home and got 16 friends.
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Q: What do you call Anarkali behind a steering wheel?
A: An air bag.
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Q: How can you tell a FAX has been sent from Anarkali?
A: There's a stamp on it.
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Q: How did Anarkali try to kill a bird?
A: Threw it off a cliff.
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Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside Anarkali's head?
A: A Space Invader.
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Q: What's the difference between Anarkali and a supermarket trolley?
A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.
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Q: What do you call Anarkali between two brunettes?
A: A mental block.
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Q: Why doesnt Anarkali eat pickles?
A: Because they get their head stuck in the jar!
"I'm Anarkali, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
The flight attendant goes and tells all of the other flight attendants. They all try to persuade Anarkali to move, but she won't move. All she says is,
"I'm Anarkali, I'm beautiful, and I'm going to New York."
The flight attendants go and tell the pilot about the obnoxious bimbo. They tell him the only thing that she says. He puts the plane on auto-pilot and whispers something in Anarkali's ear. Immediately, she gets up and moves to her normal seat. Then the pilot goes back to fly the plane. The flight attendants are all very curious about how the pilot made Anarkali move so quickly.
They ask him and he says, "Oh, it was easy. All I had to do was tell her that the first class section wasn't going to New York!"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anarkali thinks her boyfriend is cheating on her. She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly, and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of another woman. Anarkali gets very angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does, she is overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and points to her head. The boyfriend yells, "NO, honey, don't do it!"
She replies "Shut up, you're next."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
One day, Anarkali and a friend were walking along a beach. Suddenly, a bird flies over and craps on the friend.
The friend tells Anar, "Quick, go get some toilet paper!"
Anarkali replies, "By the time I get back, the bird will be gone!"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What does Anarkali and beer bottles have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What do you do when Anarkali throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How do you get Anarkali's eyes to sparkle?
Shine a flashlight in her ear?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If a Blonde and Anarkali both jumped off a building at the same time, who would land first?
The Blonde.....Anarkali would have to stop and ask directions.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anarkali couldn't call 911 because she couldn't find the 11 button on the phone.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Anarkali thought the capital of California was "C".
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why did Anarkali smile everytime there was a flash of lightning?
A: She thought someone was taking her picture.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Did you hear when Anarkali attempted to drive to EuroDisney?
A: She saw a sign saying: "EuroDisney Left" so she went home.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What did Anarkali name her pet Zebra?
A: Spot.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why did Anarkali get tire tread marks on her stomach?
A: From crawling across the street when the pedestrian sign said "DON'T WALK"
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you see when you look directly into Anarkali's eyes?
A: The back of her head.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What did Anarkali do when she went to a film that had an NC-17 (no under 17's) rating?
A: Went home and got 16 friends.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call Anarkali behind a steering wheel?
A: An air bag.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How can you tell a FAX has been sent from Anarkali?
A: There's a stamp on it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How did Anarkali try to kill a bird?
A: Threw it off a cliff.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside Anarkali's head?
A: A Space Invader.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What's the difference between Anarkali and a supermarket trolley?
A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What do you call Anarkali between two brunettes?
A: A mental block.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why doesnt Anarkali eat pickles?
A: Because they get their head stuck in the jar!
