7 Glance = 1 Smile
7 Smile = 1 Meeting
7 Meeting = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage -
And that 1 Bloody marriage has 7777777777777 Problems. So beware of glance!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Plan For Future:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Ram: I want 2 b a pilot.
Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor.
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother.
Ravi: I want 2 help Deepa.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS;
1,Too Many Questions.
2,Difficult to Understand.
3,More Explanation is Needed.
4,Resultis always FAIL!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man is dying of Cancer.
His son asked him, "Dad, why do ukeep telling people u're dying of AIDS?"
Answer:"So when I'm dead no one will dare touch ur mom!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Two seconds later a report came to
his phone and he started dancing. The report said, "DELIVERED".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, and
Panic is when both are pregnant.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Signboards that make you smile
ADVERTISEMENT
In a rest room:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER.
PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat: AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES:
PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES
WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER
YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK
OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY
THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN
ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES,
WASHING MACHINES, ETC.
WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG
AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T
KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE
FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL
YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING.
(PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR
- THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's
your turn to spread the stupidity.
Send this to someone you want to smile.
We all need a good laugh.
Keep smiling.
~`~~~~``~~~~```~~~~~```~~~~```~~~~~``~~~~~``~~~``` ~~~~``~``~
wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air,it was blown away.then
I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart Attack .
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
Police man== Stop, stop, your headlights are not working.
The Man== Move, move, even the brakes are not working.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
Why does history keep repeating it self?
Because we weren't listening the first time !
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house...
still he was in jail.......why?
coz all the 6 were firebrigade staff !
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
An Astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope.
A sardar was observing him, Suddenly a star falls, seeings
that sardar shouted "kya nishana hai"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
When ur life is in darkness pray to God ask him to
free u from darkness and if after you pray and your
still in darkness, please pay your ELECTRICITY BILL !
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
Ek dost ne sardar se poocha "yaar tu hamesha foreign channel kyon
dekhta
rehta." Sardar "yaar kuch bijli unki bhi kharcha hone do."
--------------------------------------------------------------
4 hightech sardar inventions:
---Waterproof towel
---Solar powered torch
---Book on how to read
---Pedal powered wheel chair.
----------------------------------------------------------
Sardar ke bagiche me bahut pedh the. Sardar ne naukar se bola pedho
ko
pani dal. Naukar bola "sahib barish ho rahi hai" sardar : abe budhu
chatri
pakad ke dal na".
-------------------------------------------------------------
Man:sardarji where were u born?
sardarji: punjab.
man: which part.
Sardar: oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in punjab".
----------------------------------------------------------
Lawyer to sardar: Gita pe haath laga kar kaho ke
---Sardar :yeh kya, sita pe haath lagaya to court me bulaiya. ab fir
gita pe
haath
--------------------------------------------------------------------
7 Smile = 1 Meeting
7 Meeting = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage -
And that 1 Bloody marriage has 7777777777777 Problems. So beware of glance!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Plan For Future:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?
Ram: I want 2 b a pilot.
Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor.
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother.
Ravi: I want 2 help Deepa.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS;
1,Too Many Questions.
2,Difficult to Understand.
3,More Explanation is Needed.
4,Resultis always FAIL!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A man is dying of Cancer.
His son asked him, "Dad, why do ukeep telling people u're dying of AIDS?"
Answer:"So when I'm dead no one will dare touch ur mom!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Two seconds later a report came to
his phone and he started dancing. The report said, "DELIVERED".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, and
Panic is when both are pregnant.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Signboards that make you smile
ADVERTISEMENT
In a rest room:
TOILET OUT OF ORDER.
PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW
In a Laundromat: AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES:
PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES
WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
In a London department store:
BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS
In an office:
WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER
YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK
OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN
In an office:
AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY
THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN
ON THE DRAINING BOARD
Outside a secondhand shop:
WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES,
WASHING MACHINES, ETC.
WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG
AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?
Notice in health food shop window:
CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS
Spotted in a safari park:
ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR
Seen during a conference:
FOR ANYONE WHO HAS CHILDREN AND DOESN'T
KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR
Notice in a farmer's field:
THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE
FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.
Message on a leaflet:
IF YOU CANNOT READ, THIS LEAFLET WILL TELL
YOU HOW TO GET LESSONS
On a repair shop door:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING.
(PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR
- THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's
your turn to spread the stupidity.
Send this to someone you want to smile.
We all need a good laugh.
Keep smiling.
~`~~~~``~~~~```~~~~~```~~~~```~~~~~``~~~~~``~~~``` ~~~~``~``~
wrote your name on sand it got washed.
I wrote your name in air,it was blown away.then
I wrote your name on my heart & i got Heart Attack .
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
Police man== Stop, stop, your headlights are not working.
The Man== Move, move, even the brakes are not working.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
Why does history keep repeating it self?
Because we weren't listening the first time !
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house...
still he was in jail.......why?
coz all the 6 were firebrigade staff !
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
An Astronomer was watching the sky from his telescope.
A sardar was observing him, Suddenly a star falls, seeings
that sardar shouted "kya nishana hai"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
When ur life is in darkness pray to God ask him to
free u from darkness and if after you pray and your
still in darkness, please pay your ELECTRICITY BILL !
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
Ek dost ne sardar se poocha "yaar tu hamesha foreign channel kyon
dekhta
rehta." Sardar "yaar kuch bijli unki bhi kharcha hone do."
--------------------------------------------------------------
4 hightech sardar inventions:
---Waterproof towel
---Solar powered torch
---Book on how to read
---Pedal powered wheel chair.
----------------------------------------------------------
Sardar ke bagiche me bahut pedh the. Sardar ne naukar se bola pedho
ko
pani dal. Naukar bola "sahib barish ho rahi hai" sardar : abe budhu
chatri
pakad ke dal na".
-------------------------------------------------------------
Man:sardarji where were u born?
sardarji: punjab.
man: which part.
Sardar: oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body is born in punjab".
----------------------------------------------------------
Lawyer to sardar: Gita pe haath laga kar kaho ke
---Sardar :yeh kya, sita pe haath lagaya to court me bulaiya. ab fir
gita pe
haath
--------------------------------------------------------------------
