Sign post outside our collage- "Drive Carefully! Dont kill the Students, Wait for the Lecturers!".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, "send me a brother". santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange? Because the lime was engaged.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A good friend is like a computer I 'enter' ur life, 'save' u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities & never 'delete' u from my memory!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry 4 disturb u. can u fax me ur photo, its very urgent, serious matter has comeup actually, we r playing a cards and I lost the joker
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q
What does a buffalo produce during an EarthQuake? A MilkShake
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear I know, but I was in love and didn't notice."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
r mosquitoes religious? Yes They first sing over u & then prey on you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
A Friend is like a GAS blown from the ASS, Which creates noice n nuisance to others but gives Me RELAXATION and COMFORT. Thanks for being the GAS of my ASS.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Luk at the world as 1 big chocolate cake. It would never b complete without few sweets n nuts. Sweet like ME & nut like U
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Have you heard the joke about the butter? A: I butter not tell you, It might spread!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cute… Good looking… Easy to handle… Cool… Sexy… Nice structure… Its my mobile. How about your?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is the height of Bravery, Patience & Laziness combined? A: Sitting on the sea shore waiting for TSUNAMI to clean up ur ASS
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Will, Marry, I & U are going for a party. Whats the best & worst arrangement u can make. Did u get... Best: Will, U, Marry, Me Worst: I, Will, Marry, U
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dream makes al things possible, Hope makes al things work, luv makes al thigs beutifl, smile makes al d abv so always BRUSH UR TEETH...!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boy: what will u give me as reward if i climb Mt.Everest? Girl: A push.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sincere Apology:
If u dont like ny of my SMS or dont like 2 read or if my msgs disturb u,then plz dont hesitate,feel free 2 Throw Ur Mobile!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sweet fruits r nice 2 eat.. Sweet words r nice 2 say.. But sweet people r really hard 2 find..My goodness, how da hell did u manage 2 find me!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Advice
Always listen to ur hubby, He gives sound advice :99% Sound & 1% Advice....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Consequences of American life style:
The wife rushed into house screaming 2 her husband, Darling, Come quick! Ur kids n my kids r beating our kids
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Their are moments in life when you really miss someone. And you wish you could just pluck them from your dreams..
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards.
Friedship is just like wine.. as it gets older it gets sweter.. just like you and me.. you are gettind older and i am getting sweeter.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I want u... To be with me In a nice Restaurent To have candle light dinner.... & to say say those sweet three words to U.... "Pay The Bill"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Friedship is just like wine..as it gets older it gets sweter..just like you and me..you are gettind older and i am getting sweeter.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unlike others, ur brain is a masterpiece. it has 2 halves the left & the right The left has nothing right in it & d right has nothing left in it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We've known Each other 4 Quite a while now, do u think we can be more than Frnds? Will u be my Partner 2 rob a Bank?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I saw U on Road today. U were lukin SO fine, Ur face SO divine, Ur walk SO perfect. My Heart started singing a Sweet Song: Who Let The Dogs Out!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do u know that your Smile takes 1000 People to Death ? Save The World......... So Plz start brushing regularly
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When u get ths SMS, snd it to 1 person U luv, 1 u hate, 1 u always think of & 1 u wish to kill. now keep guessing why I send it to u!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My Life was in darkness before i met u, but now it is bright.u know why? Coz u r a "Tubelight
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Birdy birdy in the sky, left a poopie in my eye. Me don't care, me don't cry, me just happy that a cow can't fly!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last night was my fault, my wife asked, "what's on the TV?" and ..... I said, "dust!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The smile is like a simcard & life is like cellphone, Whenever u insert the simcard of a smile, a beautiful day is activated Keep Smiling.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Difference: It's funny when people discuss LOVE MARRIAGE Vs ARRANGED. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
so sweet is ur SMILE..... so sweet is ur STYLE..... so sweet is ur VOICE..... so sweet is ur EYE....... see how sweetly I LIE!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some Love Golden-Ship, Some Love Silver-Ship, But I Love One Ship, That Is Your Friend-Ship
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, "send me a brother". santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange? Because the lime was engaged.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A good friend is like a computer I 'enter' ur life, 'save' u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities & never 'delete' u from my memory!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry 4 disturb u. can u fax me ur photo, its very urgent, serious matter has comeup actually, we r playing a cards and I lost the joker
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q
What does a buffalo produce during an EarthQuake? A MilkShake--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear I know, but I was in love and didn't notice."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
r mosquitoes religious? Yes They first sing over u & then prey on you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
A Friend is like a GAS blown from the ASS, Which creates noice n nuisance to others but gives Me RELAXATION and COMFORT. Thanks for being the GAS of my ASS.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Luk at the world as 1 big chocolate cake. It would never b complete without few sweets n nuts. Sweet like ME & nut like U
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Marriage is the process of finding out what kind of man your wife would have preferred.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Have you heard the joke about the butter? A: I butter not tell you, It might spread!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cute… Good looking… Easy to handle… Cool… Sexy… Nice structure… Its my mobile. How about your?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is the height of Bravery, Patience & Laziness combined? A: Sitting on the sea shore waiting for TSUNAMI to clean up ur ASS
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Will, Marry, I & U are going for a party. Whats the best & worst arrangement u can make. Did u get... Best: Will, U, Marry, Me Worst: I, Will, Marry, U
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dream makes al things possible, Hope makes al things work, luv makes al thigs beutifl, smile makes al d abv so always BRUSH UR TEETH...!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Boy: what will u give me as reward if i climb Mt.Everest? Girl: A push.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sincere Apology:
If u dont like ny of my SMS or dont like 2 read or if my msgs disturb u,then plz dont hesitate,feel free 2 Throw Ur Mobile!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sweet fruits r nice 2 eat.. Sweet words r nice 2 say.. But sweet people r really hard 2 find..My goodness, how da hell did u manage 2 find me!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Advice
Always listen to ur hubby, He gives sound advice :99% Sound & 1% Advice....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Consequences of American life style:
The wife rushed into house screaming 2 her husband, Darling, Come quick! Ur kids n my kids r beating our kids
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Their are moments in life when you really miss someone. And you wish you could just pluck them from your dreams..
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards.
Friedship is just like wine.. as it gets older it gets sweter.. just like you and me.. you are gettind older and i am getting sweeter.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I want u... To be with me In a nice Restaurent To have candle light dinner.... & to say say those sweet three words to U.... "Pay The Bill"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Friedship is just like wine..as it gets older it gets sweter..just like you and me..you are gettind older and i am getting sweeter.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Unlike others, ur brain is a masterpiece. it has 2 halves the left & the right The left has nothing right in it & d right has nothing left in it.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We've known Each other 4 Quite a while now, do u think we can be more than Frnds? Will u be my Partner 2 rob a Bank?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I saw U on Road today. U were lukin SO fine, Ur face SO divine, Ur walk SO perfect. My Heart started singing a Sweet Song: Who Let The Dogs Out!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do u know that your Smile takes 1000 People to Death ? Save The World......... So Plz start brushing regularly
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When u get ths SMS, snd it to 1 person U luv, 1 u hate, 1 u always think of & 1 u wish to kill. now keep guessing why I send it to u!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My Life was in darkness before i met u, but now it is bright.u know why? Coz u r a "Tubelight
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Birdy birdy in the sky, left a poopie in my eye. Me don't care, me don't cry, me just happy that a cow can't fly!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last night was my fault, my wife asked, "what's on the TV?" and ..... I said, "dust!"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The smile is like a simcard & life is like cellphone, Whenever u insert the simcard of a smile, a beautiful day is activated Keep Smiling.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Difference: It's funny when people discuss LOVE MARRIAGE Vs ARRANGED. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
so sweet is ur SMILE..... so sweet is ur STYLE..... so sweet is ur VOICE..... so sweet is ur EYE....... see how sweetly I LIE!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Some Love Golden-Ship, Some Love Silver-Ship, But I Love One Ship, That Is Your Friend-Ship
