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Message: <blockquote data-quote="sld" data-source="post: 104160" data-attributes="member: 3234">A transcript of the new answering service recently installed at a mental health institute"Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotlineIf you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press no-one will answer.If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969.If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.If you have amnesia press 8 and state your name, address, phone number,date of birth, social securitynumber and your mother's maiden name.If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep.please wait for the beep.If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.If you have low self esteem. Please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."</blockquote>

Verification: Hath warak paha keeyada? (hatha wadikireema paha)

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