The Hippie and the Nun
A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun.
He sits down next to her, and asks her: "Can we have sex?"
"No," she replies, "I'm married to God."
She stands up, and gets off at the next stop.
The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says: "I can tell you how to get to have sex with her!"
"Yeah?", says the hippie.
"Yeah!", say the bus driver. "She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray. So all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff
in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be God."
The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next
Tuesday night.
"I am God," he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face.
"Have sex with me."
The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal sex, as she is desperate not to lose her virginity.
'God' agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her.
As he finishes, he jumps up and throws back his hood with a flourish.
"Ha-ha," he cries. "I am the hippie!"
"Ha-ha," cries the nun. "I am the bus driver"
Funny story..
*1st Scene*
Daddy and Mommy are fighting in the living room,right in front of their
little son.
Daddy : Oh!!! You Bitch!
Mommy : What?? You Bastard!
Son : Daddy, Mommy, what's Bitch and Bastard ??
At this moment, Daddy blushes. He quickly thinks up of something.
Daddy : It means Ladies and Gentlemen son.
Son : Oh I see!
*2nd Scene *
Little Son was watching a TV show about premarital sex and there they
mentioned the words 'breasts' and 'penises' ..
Mommy was reading the papers.
Son : Mommy, what's breasts and penises?
At this moment, mommy turned blue, and quickly thought of something to say.
Mom: It means coats and hats , son.
Son : Oh I see!
*3rd Scene*
Daddy was shaving his beard and son passed by; the toilet. Suddenly daddy
cut himself and scream...
Daddy : Oh SHIT!!
Son : Daddy, what's shit?
At this moment, Daddy eyes bulged, and quickly thought of something to
say..
Daddy : It means shaving cream, son .
Son : Oh I see!!
*4th Scene*
Christmas is approaching, and mommy was stuffing the turkey into the stove.
The turkey just wouldn't fit into the stove, so she said...
Mommy : Oh! Fuck!
Son : Mommy, what's fuck ?
At this moment, Mommy froze.
She quickly thought of something to say.
Mommy : It means stuffing, son
Son : Oh I see!!
*5th Scene*
It's Chrismas Eve! Little son exuberantly opened the door to let all that
is uncles, aunties, cousins and friends come into the house.
Proudly he said... "Welcome in, Bastards and Bitches! Please put all your
breasts and penises at that corner of the house ! My parent are busy at the
moment. You see; Daddy is putting shit on his face upstairs
and mummy is fucking the turkey in the kitchen. Don't worry they will come
out in a minute!!
Everyone fainted!!!!!!!!!!
A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun.
He sits down next to her, and asks her: "Can we have sex?"
"No," she replies, "I'm married to God."
She stands up, and gets off at the next stop.
The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says: "I can tell you how to get to have sex with her!"
"Yeah?", says the hippie.
"Yeah!", say the bus driver. "She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray. So all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff
in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be God."
The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next
Tuesday night.
"I am God," he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face.
"Have sex with me."
The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal sex, as she is desperate not to lose her virginity.
'God' agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her.
As he finishes, he jumps up and throws back his hood with a flourish.
"Ha-ha," he cries. "I am the hippie!"
"Ha-ha," cries the nun. "I am the bus driver"
Funny story..
*1st Scene*
Daddy and Mommy are fighting in the living room,right in front of their
little son.
Daddy : Oh!!! You Bitch!
Mommy : What?? You Bastard!
Son : Daddy, Mommy, what's Bitch and Bastard ??
At this moment, Daddy blushes. He quickly thinks up of something.
Daddy : It means Ladies and Gentlemen son.
Son : Oh I see!
*2nd Scene *
Little Son was watching a TV show about premarital sex and there they
mentioned the words 'breasts' and 'penises' ..
Mommy was reading the papers.
Son : Mommy, what's breasts and penises?
At this moment, mommy turned blue, and quickly thought of something to say.
Mom: It means coats and hats , son.
Son : Oh I see!
*3rd Scene*
Daddy was shaving his beard and son passed by; the toilet. Suddenly daddy
cut himself and scream...
Daddy : Oh SHIT!!
Son : Daddy, what's shit?
At this moment, Daddy eyes bulged, and quickly thought of something to
say..
Daddy : It means shaving cream, son .
Son : Oh I see!!
*4th Scene*
Christmas is approaching, and mommy was stuffing the turkey into the stove.
The turkey just wouldn't fit into the stove, so she said...
Mommy : Oh! Fuck!
Son : Mommy, what's fuck ?
At this moment, Mommy froze.
She quickly thought of something to say.
Mommy : It means stuffing, son
Son : Oh I see!!
*5th Scene*
It's Chrismas Eve! Little son exuberantly opened the door to let all that
is uncles, aunties, cousins and friends come into the house.
Proudly he said... "Welcome in, Bastards and Bitches! Please put all your
breasts and penises at that corner of the house ! My parent are busy at the
moment. You see; Daddy is putting shit on his face upstairs
and mummy is fucking the turkey in the kitchen. Don't worry they will come
out in a minute!!
Everyone fainted!!!!!!!!!!
