The ***** sent this request to upper management:
I, the *****, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
reasons:
1. I do physical labor.
2. I work at great depths.
3. I plunge head first into everything I do.
4. I do not get weekends or holidays off.
5. I work in a damp environment.
6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
7. I work in high temperatures.
8. My work exposes me to diseases.
Dear *****,
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have
raised, the management denies your request for the following reasons:
1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
2. You work in short spurts and fall asleep after each brief work
period.
3. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting
other locations.
4. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have
completed the assigned task.
5. You do not take initiative; you need to be pressured and stimulated
in order to start working.
6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
7. You are unable to work double shifts.
8. You don''t always observe necessary safety regulations, such as
wearing the correct protective clothing.
9. You will retire long before age 65.
10. And if that were not enough, you have constantly been seen entering
and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags
Sincerely, The Management
I, the *****, hereby request a raise in salary for the following
reasons:
1. I do physical labor.
2. I work at great depths.
3. I plunge head first into everything I do.
4. I do not get weekends or holidays off.
5. I work in a damp environment.
6. I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
7. I work in high temperatures.
8. My work exposes me to diseases.
Dear *****,
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have
raised, the management denies your request for the following reasons:
1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
2. You work in short spurts and fall asleep after each brief work
period.
3. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen visiting
other locations.
4. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have
completed the assigned task.
5. You do not take initiative; you need to be pressured and stimulated
in order to start working.
6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
7. You are unable to work double shifts.
8. You don''t always observe necessary safety regulations, such as
wearing the correct protective clothing.
9. You will retire long before age 65.
10. And if that were not enough, you have constantly been seen entering
and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags
Sincerely, The Management
