Three boys are in the school yard bragging about how fast their fathers are.
The first one says, "my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow."
The second one replies, "you think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet."
The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says, "you two know nothing about fast. My father works for the government. He works until 4:30 and he is home by 3:45!"
...........................................................................
"Daddy, Daddy, can I have another glass of water please?"
"But I've given you 10 glasses of water already!"
"Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!"
...........................................................................
Grandma and Grandpa were watching a healing service on the television.
The evangelist called to all who wanted to be healed to go to their television set, place one hand on the TV and the other hand on the body part where they wanted to be healed.
Grandma got up and slowly hobbled to the television set, placed her right hand on the set and her left hand on her arthritic shoulder that was causing her to have great pain.
Then Grandpa got up, went to the TV, placed his right hand on the set and his left hand on his crotch.
Grandma scowled at him and said, "I guess you just don't get it. The purpose of doing this is to heal the sick, not raise the dead."
...........................................................................
sorry if report
The first one says, "my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow."
The second one replies, "you think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet."
The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says, "you two know nothing about fast. My father works for the government. He works until 4:30 and he is home by 3:45!"
...........................................................................
"Daddy, Daddy, can I have another glass of water please?"
"But I've given you 10 glasses of water already!"
"Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!"
...........................................................................
Grandma and Grandpa were watching a healing service on the television.
The evangelist called to all who wanted to be healed to go to their television set, place one hand on the TV and the other hand on the body part where they wanted to be healed.
Grandma got up and slowly hobbled to the television set, placed her right hand on the set and her left hand on her arthritic shoulder that was causing her to have great pain.
Then Grandpa got up, went to the TV, placed his right hand on the set and his left hand on his crotch.
Grandma scowled at him and said, "I guess you just don't get it. The purpose of doing this is to heal the sick, not raise the dead."
...........................................................................
sorry if report
maxxa!! 
