> THE new teacher was trying to make use of her
> > psychology courses. She
> > > started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks
> > you're stupid, stand
> > > up!"
> > > After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.
> > > The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid,
> > Little Johnny?"
> > > "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there
> > all by yourself!"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother
> > smoothed cold cream
> > > on
> > > her face.
> > > "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.
> > > "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who
> > then began removing
> > > the
> > > cream with a tissue.
> > > "What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving
> > up?"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was
> > concerned that his students
> > > might be a little confused about Jesus Christ
> > because of the Christmas
> > > season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make
> > sure they understood
> > > that
> > > the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that
> > He grew up, etc. So
> > > he
> > > asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
> > > Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
> > > Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my
> > heart."
> > > Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted
> > out, "I know! ! I
> > > know!
> > > He's in our bathroom!!!"
> > > The whole class got very quiet, looked at the
> > teacher, and waited
> > > for a
> > > response.
> > > The teacher was completely at a loss for a few
> > very long seconds.
> > > Finally,
> > > he gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how
> > he knew this.
> > > Little Johnny said, "Well...every morning, my
> > father gets up, bangs
> > > on
> > > the bathroom door, and yells, "Jesus Christ, are
> > you still in there?!"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't
> > paying attention in
> > > class
> > > She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2
> > and 4 and 28 and 44?"
> > > Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO
> > and the Cartoon
> > > Network!"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > At Sunday School they were teaching how God
> > created everything,
> > > including
> > > human beings.
> > > Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten
> > class, seemed especially
> > > intent when they told him how Eve was created out
> > of one of Adam's
> > > ribs.
> > > Later in the week his mother noticed him lying
> > down as though he were
> > > ill,
> > > and said, "Johnny what is the matter?"
> > > Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my
> > side. I think I'm
> > > going to
> > > have a wife."
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field
> > trip to their local
> > > police station where they saw pictures tacked to a
> > bulletin board of
> > > the
> > > 10 most wanted criminals.
> > > One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and
> > asked if it really was
> > > the
> > > photo of a wanted person.
> > > "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want
> > very badly to capture
> > > him."
> > > Little Johnny asked, "Why didn't you keep him
> > when you took his
> > > picture?"
****************************
> > psychology courses. She
> > > started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks
> > you're stupid, stand
> > > up!"
> > > After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.
> > > The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid,
> > Little Johnny?"
> > > "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there
> > all by yourself!"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother
> > smoothed cold cream
> > > on
> > > her face.
> > > "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked.
> > > "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who
> > then began removing
> > > the
> > > cream with a tissue.
> > > "What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving
> > up?"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was
> > concerned that his students
> > > might be a little confused about Jesus Christ
> > because of the Christmas
> > > season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make
> > sure they understood
> > > that
> > > the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that
> > He grew up, etc. So
> > > he
> > > asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
> > > Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
> > > Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my
> > heart."
> > > Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted
> > out, "I know! ! I
> > > know!
> > > He's in our bathroom!!!"
> > > The whole class got very quiet, looked at the
> > teacher, and waited
> > > for a
> > > response.
> > > The teacher was completely at a loss for a few
> > very long seconds.
> > > Finally,
> > > he gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how
> > he knew this.
> > > Little Johnny said, "Well...every morning, my
> > father gets up, bangs
> > > on
> > > the bathroom door, and yells, "Jesus Christ, are
> > you still in there?!"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't
> > paying attention in
> > > class
> > > She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2
> > and 4 and 28 and 44?"
> > > Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO
> > and the Cartoon
> > > Network!"
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > At Sunday School they were teaching how God
> > created everything,
> > > including
> > > human beings.
> > > Little Johnny, a child in the kindergarten
> > class, seemed especially
> > > intent when they told him how Eve was created out
> > of one of Adam's
> > > ribs.
> > > Later in the week his mother noticed him lying
> > down as though he were
> > > ill,
> > > and said, "Johnny what is the matter?"
> > > Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my
> > side. I think I'm
> > > going to
> > > have a wife."
> > > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > > Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field
> > trip to their local
> > > police station where they saw pictures tacked to a
> > bulletin board of
> > > the
> > > 10 most wanted criminals.
> > > One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and
> > asked if it really was
> > > the
> > > photo of a wanted person.
> > > "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want
> > very badly to capture
> > > him."
> > > Little Johnny asked, "Why didn't you keep him
> > when you took his
> > > picture?"
****************************
