A dustman is going along a street picking up the wheely bins and emptying them into his dustcart lorry. He gets to one house where the bin hasn't been left out so he has a quick look for it, goes round the back but still
can't see it so he knocks on the door.
There's no answer so he knocks again.
Eventually a Chinese bloke answers... "Harro", says the Chinese-man.
"Alright mate, where's your bin?" asks the dustman
"I bin on toilet" replies the Chinese bloke, looking perplexed.
Realizing the Chinese fellow has misunderstood, the binman smiles and says "No mate, where's ya dust bin?"
"I dust bin on toilet I told you" says the Chinese man.
"Mate" says the dustman... "you're misunderstanding me...where's your Wheely Bin?"
"OK" "OK" , the chinaman says, "I wheely bin having wank."
On their 45th wedding anniversary and during the banquet celebrating it, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration.
"Tell us Tom, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with your wife?"
Tom responds, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, forbearance, meekness, self-restraint, forgiveness and many great other qualities that you wouldn't have needed if you'd stayed single."
A drunk staggers into a bar demanding a beer. The bartender informed him that he was not allowed to serve alcohol to drunken patrons.
After a few harsh words, the bartender suggested to the drunk to prove he wasn't drunk by doing twenty push-ups on the floor.
As he was doing the push-ups, another drunk staggers into the bar and sees this guy on the floor doing push-ups.
He looks at him for a minute and then kicks him in the ribs saying,
"Fella, I think your girl friend has gone home."
Judge: Why did you shoot your wife instead of shooting her lover?
Man: Your honor, it’s easier to shoot a woman once, than shooting one man every week.
Arse Icons
(_!_) Regular arse
(__!__) Fat arse
(!) Tight arse
(_*_) Sore arse
(_o_) Well used arse
(_e=mc2_) Smart arse
(_x_) Kiss my arse
A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat for their 25th anniversary.
"HA," he snorted, "The day I buy you a fur coat will be the day you can grow hair on your chest!"
On that she hikes up her skirt, drops her panties, and thrusts her pubic area forward. "There! I have hair on my chest, now buy me a fur coat."
"That's not your chest!" he roars back.
"Damn right it's my chest," she argued, "Before we got married, this was your hope chest. On our honeymoon, it was your treasure chest. Afterwards it became our family chest. AND IF YOU DON'T BUY ME A FUR COAT, IT WILL SOON BECOME THE COMMUNITY CHEST!"
Please add REP+ and comments if you enjoyed!!! Thanks in advance...
can't see it so he knocks on the door.
There's no answer so he knocks again.
Eventually a Chinese bloke answers... "Harro", says the Chinese-man.
"Alright mate, where's your bin?" asks the dustman
"I bin on toilet" replies the Chinese bloke, looking perplexed.
Realizing the Chinese fellow has misunderstood, the binman smiles and says "No mate, where's ya dust bin?"
"I dust bin on toilet I told you" says the Chinese man.
"Mate" says the dustman... "you're misunderstanding me...where's your Wheely Bin?"
"OK" "OK" , the chinaman says, "I wheely bin having wank."
On their 45th wedding anniversary and during the banquet celebrating it, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration.
"Tell us Tom, just what is it you have learned from all those wonderful years with your wife?"
Tom responds, "Well, I've learned that marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, forbearance, meekness, self-restraint, forgiveness and many great other qualities that you wouldn't have needed if you'd stayed single."
A drunk staggers into a bar demanding a beer. The bartender informed him that he was not allowed to serve alcohol to drunken patrons.
After a few harsh words, the bartender suggested to the drunk to prove he wasn't drunk by doing twenty push-ups on the floor.
As he was doing the push-ups, another drunk staggers into the bar and sees this guy on the floor doing push-ups.
He looks at him for a minute and then kicks him in the ribs saying,
"Fella, I think your girl friend has gone home."
Judge: Why did you shoot your wife instead of shooting her lover?
Man: Your honor, it’s easier to shoot a woman once, than shooting one man every week.
Arse Icons
(_!_) Regular arse
(__!__) Fat arse
(!) Tight arse
(_*_) Sore arse
(_o_) Well used arse
(_e=mc2_) Smart arse
(_x_) Kiss my arse
A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat for their 25th anniversary.
"HA," he snorted, "The day I buy you a fur coat will be the day you can grow hair on your chest!"
On that she hikes up her skirt, drops her panties, and thrusts her pubic area forward. "There! I have hair on my chest, now buy me a fur coat."
"That's not your chest!" he roars back.
"Damn right it's my chest," she argued, "Before we got married, this was your hope chest. On our honeymoon, it was your treasure chest. Afterwards it became our family chest. AND IF YOU DON'T BUY ME A FUR COAT, IT WILL SOON BECOME THE COMMUNITY CHEST!"
Please add REP+ and comments if you enjoyed!!! Thanks in advance...
Thanks for the comment and REP+ macho! 
