Teacher : History is a very interesting subject. It tells you about what had happened in the past.
Student : Please teacher, I don't think I want to study history.
Teacher : Why ?
Student : There is no future in it.
Teacher : Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have ?
Ted : $10.
Teacher : You don't know maths.
Ted : You don't know my father!
Mother : David, come here.
David : Yes, mum ?
Mother : You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David : But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother : I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now.
Father : Why did you fail your mathematics test ?
Son : On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8
Father : So ?
Son : On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer ?
A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.
Daughter : It's mummy!
Father : How do you know ?
Daughter : She didn't say anything.
Girl : Do you love me ?
Boy : Yes Dear
Girl : Would you die for me ?
Boy : No, mine is undying love
Man : How old is your father ?
Boy : As old as me
Man : How can that be ?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born
Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give me the menu card.
Teacher : Simon, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his ?
Simon : No, teacher, it's the same dog!
Father : Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son : That's why I say she's no good!
A teacher was asking her class:
' What is the difference between ' unlawful ' and ' illegal ' ? '
Only one hand shot up.
' Ok, answer, Joan ' said the teacher.
' unlawful ' is when you do something the law doesn't allow and ' illegal ' is a sick eagle. '
Teacher : ' How come you do not comb your hair ? '
Ah Kow : ' No comb, Sir. '
Teacher : ' Use your dad's then. '
Ah Kow : ' No hair, Sir. '
A boy came home from school with his exam results.
' What did you get ? ' asked his father.
' My marks are under water, ' said the boy.
' What do you mean ' under water ' ? '
' They are all below 'C' (sea) level '
......... Some are old jokes...
anyway if you like... Just give a Rep & Bump
Student : Please teacher, I don't think I want to study history.
Teacher : Why ?
Student : There is no future in it.
Teacher : Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have ?
Ted : $10.
Teacher : You don't know maths.
Ted : You don't know my father!
Mother : David, come here.
David : Yes, mum ?
Mother : You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David : But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother : I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now.
Father : Why did you fail your mathematics test ?
Son : On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8
Father : So ?
Son : On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 And on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer ?
A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.
Daughter : It's mummy!
Father : How do you know ?
Daughter : She didn't say anything.
Girl : Do you love me ?
Boy : Yes Dear
Girl : Would you die for me ?
Boy : No, mine is undying love
Man : How old is your father ?
Boy : As old as me
Man : How can that be ?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born
Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give me the menu card.
Teacher : Simon, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his ?
Simon : No, teacher, it's the same dog!
Father : Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son : That's why I say she's no good!
A teacher was asking her class:
' What is the difference between ' unlawful ' and ' illegal ' ? '
Only one hand shot up.
' Ok, answer, Joan ' said the teacher.
' unlawful ' is when you do something the law doesn't allow and ' illegal ' is a sick eagle. '
Teacher : ' How come you do not comb your hair ? '
Ah Kow : ' No comb, Sir. '
Teacher : ' Use your dad's then. '
Ah Kow : ' No hair, Sir. '
A boy came home from school with his exam results.
' What did you get ? ' asked his father.
' My marks are under water, ' said the boy.
' What do you mean ' under water ' ? '
' They are all below 'C' (sea) level '
......... Some are old jokes...
anyway if you like... Just give a Rep & Bump
