> Lesbian :
>
> At a party a Mervin Silva sees a beautiful girl and invites
> her to dance
> with him...
> Mervin Silva : Can I dance with you?
> The Girl : I'm sorry I'm a lesbian..
> Mervin Silva : It's ok. It's ok.. I'm a THOMIAN
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> Marriage :
>
>
> Mervin Silva's Girl Friend: I'm one year older than
> you....will it bad for
> our marriage?
> Mervin Silva : No, not at all.....We'll marry in next
> year.
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Hidden Camera's :
>
> Mrs.Mervin Silva caught Mervin Silva searching high and low
> all around his
> living room.
> Mrs. Mervin Silva: 'What are you searching for?'
> Mr. Mervin Silva: 'Hidden cameras!'
> Mrs. Mervin Silva: 'And what makes you think that there
> are hidden
> cameras here?'
> Mr. Mervin Silva: 'That guy on TV knows exactly what I
> am doing. Every
> few minutes he keeps saying, 'You are
>
> watching Rupavahini channel'. How does he know
> that?'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Relaxing :
>
> Mervin Silva was enjoying the sun at the beach in America .
>
> A lady came and asked him, 'Are you relaxing?'
> Mervin Silva answered, 'No, I am Mervin Silva'
> Another guy came and asked him the same question.
> Mervin Silva answered, 'No! No! Me Mervin Silva!'
> A third one came and asked him the same question again.
> Mervin Silva was totally annoyed and decided to shift his
> place.
> While walking he saw another Sri Lankan soaking in the sun.
> He went up to him and asked, 'Are you Relaxing?'
> The other man was a lot more educated and answered,
> 'Yes, I am relaxing.'
> Mervin Silva slapped him on his face and said,'Stupid,
> idiot. Everyone is
> looking for you and you are sitting over here!'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Heaven :
>
> Mervin Silva died and went to heaven.
> When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that
> new rules are
> in effect due to the advances in education on
> earth. In order to
> gain admittance each soul must answer two simple questions:
>
> 1. Name two days of the week that begin with
> 'T'.
> 2. How many seconds are there in a year?
>
> Mervin Silva thought for a few minutes and answered.
> 1. The two days of the week that begin with
> 'T' are Today and
> Tomorrow.
> 2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
>
> Saint Peter said, 'OK, I'll buy the Today and
> Tomorrow answer, even though
> it's not the answer I expected. But how
>
> did you get 12 seconds in a year?'
>
> Mervin Silva replied, 'Well, January 2nd, February 2nd,
> March 2nd, etc...'
>
> Saint Peter opens the gate without another word.
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> The Wash Basin :
>
> Mervin Silva goes to a hotel in Colombo and eats heartily.
> After eating he goes to wash his hands but starts washing
> the basin
> instead...
> The manager comes running and asks him,'Sir, what are
> you doing?'
> Mervin Silva replies, 'Read this board here, it says
> `Wash Basin'.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> English Exam :
>
> Mervin Silva finished his English exam and came out.
> His friends asked him how he did his exam. He replied,
> 'Exam was okay, but
> for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought,
> and thought, at
> last I wrote THUNK!!!'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> Answer the following questions in brief :
>
> Mervin Silva is appearing for his University final
> examination.
> He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the
> question paper
> for five minutes and then in a fit of inspiration
>
> takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He
> then removes his
> shirt and throws it away as well, followed by his
> pants, socks and
> watch.
> The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is
> going on.
> 'I am only following the instructions here,' he
> says, 'it says here, `Answer
> the following questions in brief'.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Essay :
>
> The English teacher told all the students in the class to
> write an essay
> on a cricket match. All were busy writing except
>
> Mervin Silva.
> He had written. 'DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH !!! '
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> The Postman :
>
> The Postman: 'I have to come 5 miles to deliver you
> this parcel.'
> Mervin Silva: 'Why did you come so far? Instead you
> could have posted it.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Coffee Shop :
>
> Mervin Silva and his wife went to a coffee shop .
> Mervin Silva said, 'Hurry Up Drink
> quickly.....!!!'.
> His wife asked, ' why...???'
> Mervin Silva said, 'Hot Coffee Rs.5 and Cold Coffee Rs.
> 10'.
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Letter to his Son :
>
> Mervin Silva was writing something very slowly.
> A friend came and askes, 'Why are you writing so
> slowly?'
> Mervin Silva replies, 'I'm writing to my 6 year old
> son,... he can't read
> very fast.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> How I Look When Im Sleeping :
>
> Mervin Silva was standing in front of the mirror with his
> eyes closed.
> His wife sees this and asks: What you are doing.....????
> Mervin Silva replies, I'm seeing how I look while
> I'm sleeping....!!!
Sorry if a Repost.
>
> At a party a Mervin Silva sees a beautiful girl and invites
> her to dance
> with him...
> Mervin Silva : Can I dance with you?
> The Girl : I'm sorry I'm a lesbian..
> Mervin Silva : It's ok. It's ok.. I'm a THOMIAN
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> Marriage :
>
>
> Mervin Silva's Girl Friend: I'm one year older than
> you....will it bad for
> our marriage?
> Mervin Silva : No, not at all.....We'll marry in next
> year.
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Hidden Camera's :
>
> Mrs.Mervin Silva caught Mervin Silva searching high and low
> all around his
> living room.
> Mrs. Mervin Silva: 'What are you searching for?'
> Mr. Mervin Silva: 'Hidden cameras!'
> Mrs. Mervin Silva: 'And what makes you think that there
> are hidden
> cameras here?'
> Mr. Mervin Silva: 'That guy on TV knows exactly what I
> am doing. Every
> few minutes he keeps saying, 'You are
>
> watching Rupavahini channel'. How does he know
> that?'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Relaxing :
>
> Mervin Silva was enjoying the sun at the beach in America .
>
> A lady came and asked him, 'Are you relaxing?'
> Mervin Silva answered, 'No, I am Mervin Silva'
> Another guy came and asked him the same question.
> Mervin Silva answered, 'No! No! Me Mervin Silva!'
> A third one came and asked him the same question again.
> Mervin Silva was totally annoyed and decided to shift his
> place.
> While walking he saw another Sri Lankan soaking in the sun.
> He went up to him and asked, 'Are you Relaxing?'
> The other man was a lot more educated and answered,
> 'Yes, I am relaxing.'
> Mervin Silva slapped him on his face and said,'Stupid,
> idiot. Everyone is
> looking for you and you are sitting over here!'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Heaven :
>
> Mervin Silva died and went to heaven.
> When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that
> new rules are
> in effect due to the advances in education on
> earth. In order to
> gain admittance each soul must answer two simple questions:
>
> 1. Name two days of the week that begin with
> 'T'.
> 2. How many seconds are there in a year?
>
> Mervin Silva thought for a few minutes and answered.
> 1. The two days of the week that begin with
> 'T' are Today and
> Tomorrow.
> 2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
>
> Saint Peter said, 'OK, I'll buy the Today and
> Tomorrow answer, even though
> it's not the answer I expected. But how
>
> did you get 12 seconds in a year?'
>
> Mervin Silva replied, 'Well, January 2nd, February 2nd,
> March 2nd, etc...'
>
> Saint Peter opens the gate without another word.
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> The Wash Basin :
>
> Mervin Silva goes to a hotel in Colombo and eats heartily.
> After eating he goes to wash his hands but starts washing
> the basin
> instead...
> The manager comes running and asks him,'Sir, what are
> you doing?'
> Mervin Silva replies, 'Read this board here, it says
> `Wash Basin'.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> English Exam :
>
> Mervin Silva finished his English exam and came out.
> His friends asked him how he did his exam. He replied,
> 'Exam was okay, but
> for the past tense of THINK, I thought, thought,
> and thought, at
> last I wrote THUNK!!!'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> Answer the following questions in brief :
>
> Mervin Silva is appearing for his University final
> examination.
> He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the
> question paper
> for five minutes and then in a fit of inspiration
>
> takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He
> then removes his
> shirt and throws it away as well, followed by his
> pants, socks and
> watch.
> The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is
> going on.
> 'I am only following the instructions here,' he
> says, 'it says here, `Answer
> the following questions in brief'.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Essay :
>
> The English teacher told all the students in the class to
> write an essay
> on a cricket match. All were busy writing except
>
> Mervin Silva.
> He had written. 'DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH !!! '
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * *
> The Postman :
>
> The Postman: 'I have to come 5 miles to deliver you
> this parcel.'
> Mervin Silva: 'Why did you come so far? Instead you
> could have posted it.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Coffee Shop :
>
> Mervin Silva and his wife went to a coffee shop .
> Mervin Silva said, 'Hurry Up Drink
> quickly.....!!!'.
> His wife asked, ' why...???'
> Mervin Silva said, 'Hot Coffee Rs.5 and Cold Coffee Rs.
> 10'.
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> Letter to his Son :
>
> Mervin Silva was writing something very slowly.
> A friend came and askes, 'Why are you writing so
> slowly?'
> Mervin Silva replies, 'I'm writing to my 6 year old
> son,... he can't read
> very fast.'
>
> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> * * * * * * * *
> * * *
> How I Look When Im Sleeping :
>
> Mervin Silva was standing in front of the mirror with his
> eyes closed.
> His wife sees this and asks: What you are doing.....????
> Mervin Silva replies, I'm seeing how I look while
> I'm sleeping....!!!
Sorry if a Repost.
