Sign post outside our collage- "Drive Carefully! Dont kill the Students, Wait for the Lecturers!".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, "send me a brother". santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange? Because the lime was engaged.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A good friend is like a computer I 'enter' ur life, 'save' u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities & never 'delete' u from my memory!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry 4 disturb u. can u fax me ur photo, its very urgent, serious matter has comeup actually, we r playing a cards and I lost the joker
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q
What does a buffalo produce during an EarthQuake? A MilkShake
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear I know, but I was in love and didn't notice."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
r mosquitoes religious? Yes They first sing over u & then prey on you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
My girl and me, we are so perfect, she loves me, and I love myself too...
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering.
Born Free. . . . .Taxed to Death.
I want to suck you... lick you... wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
Why were males created before females? Cos you always need a rough draft before the final copy.
This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.
Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job is a crime?
I'm sorry that I'm running late! There is a power failure and I am stuck on the escalator.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is the difference between Mother & Wife? One woman brings you into this world crying... & the other ensures you Continue to do so!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
U r a Stupid Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sugar is sugar, Salt is salt, God made you dumbo, not my fault!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Whn you r alone, Whn you r crying, whn you r upset, Don't think of me!! just call me Bcoz incoming is free for me... my friend!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why did God Create 'you' before Me....? Ans: B'cause he wanted to Create a 'Sample', Be 4 Creating A *Master-Piece*
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Days are 2 Busy, Hours are 2Fast, Seconds are 2 Few But there's always Time for Me 2 disturb You
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? A: Knock on the door.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SMS Heaven! Q) Why do Gods stay up in heaven? A) Because they are afraid of what they have created!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A woman is sitting at a bar. A man approaches her. Hi, honey, he says. Want a little company? Why? asks the woman. Do you have one to sell?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There are 4 animal species a woman needs in her life: Jaguar in her garage, mink in her closet, tiger in her bed! And ofcourse a donkey to pay her bills!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do you take me 2 be ur lawfully loveable fren, 2 have and 2 hold, 4 rich qoutes or corny jokes, in text meassging & in poor signal, till low batt do us part?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Husbd: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle. Wife: Yes darling I still do, only differnece is earlier it was 300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Why is your nose red? Max: I smelled a b-rose. Teacher: But there is no "b" in rose. Max: There was in this one!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now..... sorry I have to leave, I can't find a brain.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now..... sorry I have to leave, I can't find a brain.
Sign post outside our collage- "Drive Carefully! Dont kill the Students, Wait for the Lecturers!".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, "send me a brother". santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange? Because the lime was engaged.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A good friend is like a computer I 'enter' ur life, 'save' u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities & never 'delete' u from my memory!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry 4 disturb u. can u fax me ur photo, its very urgent, serious matter has comeup actually, we r playing a cards and I lost the joker
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q What does a buffalo produce during an EarthQuake? A MilkShake
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear I know, but I was in love and didn't notice."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
r mosquitoes religious? Yes They first sing over u & then prey on you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, "send me a brother". santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange? Because the lime was engaged.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A good friend is like a computer I 'enter' ur life, 'save' u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities & never 'delete' u from my memory!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry 4 disturb u. can u fax me ur photo, its very urgent, serious matter has comeup actually, we r playing a cards and I lost the joker
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q
What does a buffalo produce during an EarthQuake? A MilkShake--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear I know, but I was in love and didn't notice."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
r mosquitoes religious? Yes They first sing over u & then prey on you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
My girl and me, we are so perfect, she loves me, and I love myself too...
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering.
Born Free. . . . .Taxed to Death.
I want to suck you... lick you... wanna move my tongue all over you...wanna feel you in my mouth...yep, tat's how u...eat an ice cream!
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
Why were males created before females? Cos you always need a rough draft before the final copy.
This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.
Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job is a crime?
I'm sorry that I'm running late! There is a power failure and I am stuck on the escalator.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is the difference between Mother & Wife? One woman brings you into this world crying... & the other ensures you Continue to do so!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
U r a Stupid Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sugar is sugar, Salt is salt, God made you dumbo, not my fault!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Whn you r alone, Whn you r crying, whn you r upset, Don't think of me!! just call me Bcoz incoming is free for me... my friend!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why did God Create 'you' before Me....? Ans: B'cause he wanted to Create a 'Sample', Be 4 Creating A *Master-Piece*
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Days are 2 Busy, Hours are 2Fast, Seconds are 2 Few But there's always Time for Me 2 disturb You
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? A: Knock on the door.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SMS Heaven! Q) Why do Gods stay up in heaven? A) Because they are afraid of what they have created!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A woman is sitting at a bar. A man approaches her. Hi, honey, he says. Want a little company? Why? asks the woman. Do you have one to sell?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
There are 4 animal species a woman needs in her life: Jaguar in her garage, mink in her closet, tiger in her bed! And ofcourse a donkey to pay her bills!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do you take me 2 be ur lawfully loveable fren, 2 have and 2 hold, 4 rich qoutes or corny jokes, in text meassging & in poor signal, till low batt do us part?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Husbd: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle. Wife: Yes darling I still do, only differnece is earlier it was 300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Why is your nose red? Max: I smelled a b-rose. Teacher: But there is no "b" in rose. Max: There was in this one!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now..... sorry I have to leave, I can't find a brain.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello I am a virus and I am entering your brain right now..... sorry I have to leave, I can't find a brain.
Sign post outside our collage- "Drive Carefully! Dont kill the Students, Wait for the Lecturers!".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A small kid wrote to Santa Clause, "send me a brother". santa wrote back, "send me ur mother".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scientists all over the world r wondering how long a human being can live without a brain... Kindly tell them ur age...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What happened 2 ur network? I tried 2 call u but the operator said "Welcome 2 the jungle, the monkey u r trying to call is on the tree....Plz try later."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
God thought that since he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother. Then devil thought that he couldn't b everywhere he made a mother-in-law.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why couldn't the apple send an e-mail to the orange? Because the lime was engaged.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A good friend is like a computer I 'enter' ur life, 'save' u in my heart, 'format' ur problems, 'shift' u 2 opportunities & never 'delete' u from my memory!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
sorry 4 disturb u. can u fax me ur photo, its very urgent, serious matter has comeup actually, we r playing a cards and I lost the joker
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q
What does a buffalo produce during an EarthQuake? A MilkShake--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear I know, but I was in love and didn't notice."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When in life, you wake up n you don't see anyone, then come to me. I will be there to take you to an eye specialist!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
r mosquitoes religious? Yes They first sing over u & then prey on you
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey? A kiss is so dear, a car is too dear and a monkey is U dear.
