TOTO - Jokes

[kasunsankalpana]

TEACHER: Why are you late?
>TOTO: Because of the sign.
>TEACHER: What sign?
>TOTO: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, why are you doing your math sums on the floor?
>TOTO: You told me to do it without using tables!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, how do you spell "crocodile"?
>TOTO: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
>TEACHER: No, that's wrong
>TOTO: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
>TOTO: "HIJKLMNO"!!
>TEACHER: What are you talking about?
>TOTO: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, go to the map and find North America.
>TOTO: Here it is!
>TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
>CLASS: TOTO!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, name one important thing we have today that we
>didn't have ten years ago.
>TOTO: Me!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, why do you always get so dirty?
>TOTO: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TOTO: Dad, can you write in the dark?
>FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
>TOTO: Your name on this report card.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
>TOTO: Don't bite any.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-**-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, give me a sentence starting with "I".
>TOTO: I is...
>TEACHER: No, TOTO. Always say, "I am."
>TOTO: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
>TOTO: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day,
>same
>time."
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's
>Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his
>father didn't punish him?"
>TOTO: "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TOTO: Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
>FATHER: No. Why do you ask that?
>TOTO: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is
>green
>and one is blue with red spots!
>TOTO: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like
>that
>at home.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and
>stopped
>him,what virtue would I be showing?
>TOTO: Brotherly love?
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: Now, TOTO, tell me frankly do you say prayers before
>eating?
>TOTO: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: TOTO, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same
>as
>your brother's. Did you copy his?
>TOTO: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>
>TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when
>people
>are no longer interested?
>TOTO: A teacher.
>*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
>