1. Turning your wife into a prostitute is a great way to save your marriage
2. Arnold without a one liner is like a jelly donut without the donut.
3. Generally speaking, horses are fast enough to catch up with motorcycles.
4. Secret agents create the most boring cover names.
5. A submachine gun rolling down stairs will kill more people than a nuclear explosion.
6. When in doubt, use a Harrier Jump Jet to kill the bad guy.
7. Terrorists from the middle east cannot operate video cameras.
8. Wanting to jump into a large pool with a horse from the roof is never a good idea.
9. Taking an elevator with a horse is definitely a good idea.
10. Tom Arnold needs to check where his balls are more often.
11. Dancing the Tango terribly badly is a great way to stay undercover.
