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  1. xcorect

    Rules For The Bed Room Golf

    1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play - normally one club and two balls. 2. Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole. 3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out. 4. For most effective play, the club should...
  2. xcorect

    I WOULD PAY 10

    A husband leaves the house to go pick up dinner for he and his wife. Shortly after leaving, the doorbell rings. It is her husbands best friend and she invites him in. Since she is in her bathrobe the man says to her "you have the nicest breasts". She says "thanks but my husband would be mad if...
  3. xcorect

    No Kicking Plz

    A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. "Not yet," said the little boy. His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little p*ssed, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes...
  4. xcorect

    Deer Hunting

    A hunter kills a deer and brings it home. He decides to clean it, prepare it, and serve the deer meat for dinner. He knows his kids are fussy eaters, and won't eat it if they know what it is, so he doesn't tell them. His little boy keeps asking him, "What's for dinner dad?" "You'll see", he...
  5. xcorect

    The Wedding Advertisetment

    A mother had three daughters and on their wedding, she tells each one of them to write back about their married life. The first one gets married.... On the second day a letter arrives with a single message... simply; "Maxwell Coffeehouse" Mother became confused and finally noticed in a Maxwell...
  6. xcorect

    Don't Step On The Ducks

    Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven...don't step on the ducks." So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although...
  7. xcorect

    The Centipede Story

    This guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for his house. He...
  8. xcorect

    New Math Formula For Women

    :cool:
  9. xcorect

    Father's Son

    A young man with a wild and multi-coloured hairstyle sits next to an old man on a park bench. The old man stares at the young man. "What's the matter, old man?" says the young man. "Never done anything crazy in your life?" The old man replies: "Yeah. When I was in the Navy, I got really drunk...
  10. xcorect

    Evidence

    One day an old woman walked into a shop and got some dog food, she went to pay for it and the cashier said you can't buy that dog food we need evidence that you have a dog, so she brought in her dog and she got the dog food. The next day the same old lady went to get some cat food and the...
  11. xcorect

    Car Sale

    Nilanthi was trying to sell her old car, and wasn't having much luck, since the car had 250,000 miles on it. She was telling her problem to a friend at work one day, and the friend told her, "Well, there is something you could do to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal." "I don't...
  12. xcorect

    One Day in the

    One fine day in the garden of Eden, the Lord called to Adam. "Adam," he said, "It is time for you and Eve to begin the process of populating the earth. So, to start things off, I want you to kiss her." Adam answered, "All right, Lord, but what is a kiss?" So the Lord gave a brief description of...
  13. xcorect

    Urine Test

    A nun goes for a urine test and by mistake the sample got mixed up. The doctor told the nun she was pregnant. She cried out “We can’t even trust candles now..!!”
  14. xcorect

    BLOOD TEST

    Boy goes for blood test. Nurse takes the sample & can’t find cotton so sucks his fingure! Boy is so happy he asks, “Can I get a urine test done?
  15. xcorect

    A DIFFERENET SEX

    Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too !" Then I said...
  16. xcorect

    Lamp With The Genie

    Once man found a lamp with a genie & got just one wish. Man asked him 2 build a bridge 2 Hawaii. Genie was crazy about this and said “No man, this is impossible. Too much concrete, too much work. Try another.” Man thought for a second and said “Ok, ok, I’m four times divorced. Girls jjust hate...
  17. xcorect

    WHY AIRPLANES ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN:

    An airplane will kill you quick... a woman takes her time. Airplane skin doesn't wrinkle as badly. Airplanes don't take forever to warm up. Airplanes like to do it inverted. It's easier to get an airplane trimmed. You can keep an airplane from stalling. Airplanes can be turned on (and off!!)...
  18. xcorect

    Appointment

    One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says:"I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh." The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few...
  19. xcorect

    Room No

    A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman. As he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both startled and he says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."...
  20. xcorect

    Orgasms

    1) Positive Orgasms..."Oh yes,Ohh yess,OHHH YESSSSS" 2) Negative Orgasms..."Oh no, Ohh noo,OHHHH NOOOOO" 3) The Spiritual Orgasm.."Oh god,Ohh godd,OHHH GODDDD" 4) The fake Orgasm....."Oh Daaarlin,Ohh Daaarling, Ohhh Daaarling" 5) The Indian Classical Orgasm...

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