Worldwide Dating Protocols
WHITE WOMEN:
First date:
You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date:
You get to grope all over and make out a bit.
Third date:
You get to have sex but only when
She wants to and only in the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
First Date:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date:
You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date:
You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date:
You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat ring.
5th Anniversary:
You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary:
You find yourself a Mistress.
CHINESE WOMEN:
First date:
You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date:
You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again.
Third date:
You don't even get to the third date and you've already realized
Nothing is ever going to happen.
INDIAN WOMEN:
First date:
Meet her parents.
Second date:
Set the date of the wedding.
Third date:
Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
First Date:
You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date:
You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
Third Date:
You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date:
She's pregnant by someone other than you.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
First Date:
You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have
sex in the back of her car.
Second Date:
She's pregnant.
Third Date:
She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Tijuana strip.
JEWISH WOMEN:
First Date:
You will have to spend all your money to impress her.
Second Date:
You will take a loan to keep the image
Third Date :
Your are broke, she finds someone wealthier
ARAB WOMEN:
First Date:
Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles,
Friends and entire Arab community finds out.
Second Date:
Guy is shot dead.
No third date!!
SRI LANKAN WOMEN:
First Date:
You see her, chase her and manage to give the contact, and add her in FB on the very same day.
Second Date:
You will spend all day surfing through her FB profile, add comments and liking her pictures, sending her applications and gifts and later have a lengthy telephone conversation with her, till 2 a.m. in the morning!!! She respond nicely and now you think she likes you!!!
Third Date:
You ask her and around mid night she will say “Let’s stay as Friends” or “I have many future plans…so I’m not thinking of an affair now”
And most probably on fourth day you will see her with a guy!!
WHITE WOMEN:
First date:
You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date:
You get to grope all over and make out a bit.
Third date:
You get to have sex but only when
She wants to and only in the missionary position.
IRISH WOMEN:
First Date:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary:
You both get blind drunk and have sex.
ITALIAN WOMEN:
First Date:
You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date:
You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date:
You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3-carat ring.
5th Anniversary:
You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary:
You find yourself a Mistress.
CHINESE WOMEN:
First date:
You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date:
You buy her an even more expensive dinner. Nothing happens again.
Third date:
You don't even get to the third date and you've already realized
Nothing is ever going to happen.
INDIAN WOMEN:
First date:
Meet her parents.
Second date:
Set the date of the wedding.
Third date:
Wedding night.
BLACK WOMEN:
First Date:
You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date:
You get to buy her and her girlfriends a real expensive dinner.
Third Date:
You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date:
She's pregnant by someone other than you.
MEXICAN WOMEN:
First Date:
You buy her an expensive dinner, get drunk on Tequila, and have
sex in the back of her car.
Second Date:
She's pregnant.
Third Date:
She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in and you live on rice and beans for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a home along the Tijuana strip.
JEWISH WOMEN:
First Date:
You will have to spend all your money to impress her.
Second Date:
You will take a loan to keep the image
Third Date :
Your are broke, she finds someone wealthier
ARAB WOMEN:
First Date:
Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts, Uncles,
Friends and entire Arab community finds out.
Second Date:
Guy is shot dead.
No third date!!
SRI LANKAN WOMEN:
First Date:
You see her, chase her and manage to give the contact, and add her in FB on the very same day.
Second Date:
You will spend all day surfing through her FB profile, add comments and liking her pictures, sending her applications and gifts and later have a lengthy telephone conversation with her, till 2 a.m. in the morning!!! She respond nicely and now you think she likes you!!!
Third Date:
You ask her and around mid night she will say “Let’s stay as Friends” or “I have many future plans…so I’m not thinking of an affair now”
And most probably on fourth day you will see her with a guy!!
