Funny SMS (a bit 18+)

[dushan90]

Ok machanla. Here are some more SMSs after a long time pause.

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A N*k*d girl enters in a Taxi....
suddenly driver got shocked on seeing her.....
Girl : wHat r u looking at ??? don't you ever seen a n*k*d girl ???
Driver : no..!! i was suprised that where you put ur money !!!!!
===============================================================
A girl Looked at her P*S*ey
She couldnt resist and started touching it.
.
She went crazy and rubbed it so hard that
.
.
her puss*y said MEOW and ran away !!!!
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During War a Soldier sees 3 Enemy girls and an old lady
.
Soldier:I want revenge, Ill fucckk you all
.
Girllz Leave the OLD lady
.
Old lady:SHUT UP! WAR IS WAR
===============================================================

Kohomada.
Ok nam rep dunnata kamak na.

 

[dushan90]

Menna thawath tikak.

===============================================================
Two employees were caught n***d and having s*x
in the office by the Guard...
Guard: Aha! Violating company rules!
Man: What rule?
Guard: Not wearing uniforms...
===============================================================
OnCe hijackers hijacked a Kingfisher plane and
instruct all air hostess to lay down on floor removing their uniform...
An air-hostess asked..sir, is this a plane hijack or
mr. maliya routine girls inspection!!!
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Ques: Why Do Boys Run Faster Than Girls?
.
.
.
.
Think Like an Engineer.
.
.
Answer: Because Boys have a 2 Ball-Bearings In between their Legs to Reduce Friction.
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Two ladies talking to each other...
.
.
Lady 1: How come your husband is coming home early now a days?
Lady 2: Bcoz i have started a new rule.
Lady 1: What is it?
Lady 2: S*x will be started sharp at Nine whether he is here or not!!!
===============================================================

 

[dushan90]

Some more.........

=================================================================
Boy (to girl): What's there in between your legs?
.
.
Girl: He*l ! And what's there in between your legs?
.
.
Boy: A sinner, who wants to go to he*l !!!
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A good discussion is like a miniskirt
.
.
Short enough to pertain interest and
.
.
long enough to cover the subject
===============================================================
On dinner, Son asks father: How many kinds of b***s are there?
DAD: 3 kinds,
In 20s like oranges, round n firm.
In 30-40 like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
Aftr 50 like onions, u see them they make u cry!!!
===============================================================
One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister."
Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."
===============================================================
John:Ur scretry is vry sxy
Joe:its a robot
Hr name is Pinky
u sqz hr rite brest she taks dictation
u sqz d left, she typs
Ill lend it to u fr a dy u cn see for urslf
Nxt dy John caled Joe frm hspital
U BSTRD
u didnt tel Pinkys pusy is pencil sharpner
===============================================================

Ela neda.
Rep denna kiyala illanne na, but dunnata tharahath na...

 

[SaNDun]

ela ela.. thanks !!! +5 rep added !!

 

[shan4djfun]

fatta

 

[dushan90]

ela ela.. thanks !!! +5 rep added !!

OH! Thanks machan....

 

[dushan90]

fatta

 

[Dolu]

thawa dala,,matath dapan....he...he..

 

[Smartm]

he he patta machan
++

 

[muvindu]

 

[dushan90]

After a very loooong long time here are some funny SMS's... Keep in mind guys these are only for fun, nothing more than that


__________________________________________________________________
5 men are raping a woman.

The woman is laughing nonstop.

So after sometime the men get bugged n ask her y is she laughn.

She replies,

"I hV aids"
__________________________________________________________________

A 13 year girl at a bra shop...

Girl-show me bra

Shop keeper-36"?

Girl-smaller

Shop keeper-32"?

Girl-smaller

Shop keeper-24"?

Girl-smaller

Shop keeper-20"?

Girl-smaller

Shop keeper(in angry)-madam u take some cream it must b a pimple.........
__________________________________________________________________

A hot girl removes her jeans tells to her boyfriend,

MAKE ME FEEL LIKE A WIFE.

The boy also removes his jeans says
.
,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
WASH BOTH THE JEANS...
__________________________________________________________________

Girl: Excuse me brother that's my seat

Boy: OK but i m not your brother.

My father never touched your mom

Girl: True, but my father did....
__________________________________________________________________

First night husband: I can't find ur hole,

Wife: but why?

Husband: sweetheart i'm a Bycycle repairer,i can"t find the hole untill sink into the water.
__________________________________________________________________

Girl told her mom.
Mom my bra get tighten when i see that boy.
Then the mom replied Next time dont wear the bra, his pant would tightn
__________________________________________________________________

Aftr marriage couple in bed
She feels his hand rubbing her shoulder.

She:0h!dat feels gud.
hand moves 2 her breast.

She:Honey,dats wonderful.
hand moves 2 her leg.

She:0h honey dnt stop.
He stops.

She:Why did u stop?
He: Coz I found d remote!.
__________________________________________________________________

How do u teach MATHs to a girl?

Add her to the bed, substract her clothes, divide her legs

start multiplying.

 

[sudumalli2009]

ලොල්

 

[sanath ekanayake]

 

[LKS007]

fattaaaaaaaaaaaa

 

[dgvirajm]

HEHE!
patta +rep

 

[Proxies]

 

[amilazzz]

elaz

 

[dushan90]

A boy open his pants and ask a girl
do u want this?
Girl remove her skirt and panties and replied:
My mom said: you have this
and you will get plenty of those.....!!

 

[dushan90]

Girl: Excuse me brother that's my seat

Boy: OK but i m not your brother.

My father never touched your mom

Girl: True, but my father did....

 

[dushan90]

On their first night, both husband and wife claimed to be a v****n.

Wife : '' Honey, are you sure you are a v****n? If this is your first time, why are you doing so well? ''

Husband : '' If this is your first time, how you know that I'm doing so well...?"